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365 Reasons to Love Comics #271

Cronin’s post a little down below reminded me of this. And it’s the weekend, and readership goes down, and it’s already tomorrow for me, so what the hell. Here’s one of the greatest superheroes ever created. (Archive.)

9/28/07

271. Dogwelder

Dogwelder 1.jpg

Brought to life by Garth Ennis and John McCrea in the pages of the much-missed Hitman series at DC, Dogwelder was a dude who welded dogs to the faces of his enemies. Aaaand… well, that was pretty much it. Lots of dogwelding going on.

Really, Dogwelder is just a symbol for the wonderful insanity that peppered the pages of Hitman. After all, this was a series with a supporting cast that included guys like Baytor, who is Baytor; Hacken, who hacked his own hand off and shot it to death in case it became a zombie; and the entire Section 8 crew, with fellas like drunk-all-the-time Sixpack, may-have-sodomized-Kyle-Rayner Bueno Excelente, the Defenestrator, Jean de Baton-Baton, whose power is that of Frenchness, and Dogwelder himself. The bad guys? Well they included a mobster whose dead conjoined twin was still attached and another mobster who only conducted business on the toilet.

Dogwelder 2.jpg

So, yeah. As you can see, Hitman was filled with fun idea-gems. And yeah, you can pick up JLA/Hitman this month and next. Unfortunately, it’s only built for people who are intimately familiar with the series– at least, that’s how you’ll get all the jokes. Now if only DC would just put out all of Hitman in trade… dangit…

Fun fact: Dogwelder won a Wizard award for “Best new character” back when people actually read Wizard. He may have been a one-note character, but by God, it was one helluva note.

14 Comments

Man, I gotta read Hitman one of these days.

I maintain someone must have been cooking the books for Dogwelder to not come in at #1 on the top 50 DC characters poll.

He didn’t just weld them to people’s faces. I’m fairly certain Lobo ended up with one attached to his arse (after his marriage to Bueno Excelente).

Having read all of Preacher, quite a bit of his Judge Dredd work, and most of the current run on Punisher (but not, to date, War Stories), I still maintain that Hitman is Garth Ennis’ magnum opus.

Haven’t ever read Hitman, but…

another mobster who only conducted business on the toilet.

…doing business while doing business (by phone) is awesome and efficient…and probably tough on the ass after a while.

Hitman is hands down my favorite DC Comic ever.

I really liked part one of JLA/Hitman. but that was a very odd take on Wally.

I’d really like to read Hitman, but stupid DC won’t release it in trades.

Michael Moore’s next movie is going to be about how DC is denying the world it’s right to Hitman. In this case, you’d be more than jusitified in stealing it off the internet, my friend.

And I’m partial to the Defenestrator.

If I heard the story correctly Dogwelder was created in a bar. I can’t remember who was there (Ennis was obviously) but they started coming up with “stupidest names for characters” and somebody won with “Dogwelder”

Way I heard it, they started the contest, John McCrea’s first suggestion was ‘Dogwelder’, and they immediately stopped, because nobody could top ‘Dogwelder’ and they all knew it.

Jean de Baton-Baton’s name was taken from a rant in a Denis Leary comedy routine.

Bueno Excellente was from a line of dialog in a porno movie.

I’m pretty sure I read somewhere that Steve Dillon either came up with the idea for Dogwelder or that he designed the character, but either way, he was pretty involved in the creation.

[...] 271. Dogwelder More to come! Look for a new Reason every day! (Maybe!) [...]

I know it’s an old thread, but I had to add that the DC One Million episode of Hitman had a wonderful character called Blind Bastard in it. Y’know. Sorta’ like Daredevil, only not. Even if you’ve never read the series, you gotta try to get your hands on this book. It was a 5th week one-shot in ’98 or so.

Dave is correct, Steve Dillon mentioned in a panel at a con last year that he came up with Dogwelder and the idea was really just a big, stupid joke, nothing high brow or metaphorical about it.

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