I like the strip, but admit it took me the second read through to "get it" (Oh, he can't say I love you -- yes, universal) I do agree it's maybe a panel or 2 too long. Is it a young George W Bush? kidding!

About the length, now I realize that i perhaps made it too long! My intention was to do a long strip, in order to convey a little more drama and take advantage of the unlimited scrolling web features, but I think I overreacted I'll have it in mind for next time!

And I'll follow davidwynne advice too, from now on I will add one more draft step to check anatomy and proportions, and to tighten the pencils a little bit more before inking. I know I have to get rid of the impatience I often feel! Whenever I start a strip or a page, I feel the urge to see it finished as soon as possible, which leads to mistakes like the ones in this strip. I'll try to keep that out of my mind.

Thank you a lot all of you guys, I think your critiques will be very helpful for me!

I don't care.

- great use of body language and the dialogue balloon

- definitely better than the Comics Critics strip

And I thought the strip was funny. Upon reading a second time, I'd probably leave out one of the bottom two panels.

That wasn't funny.

First of all, the strip is great. I like it a lot.

That said, I agree that it could have been a panel or two shorter. Panels 8 and 9 aren't really necessary from a story telling point of view. I suppose it depends on the tone you're going for, though- if you want an emotional, sympathetic response, then the extra panels help build that connection, and a sort of suspense. However, if you're going for a laugh, then the shorter the better, I think (at least in this case).

Also, as others have said, the proportions are a bit off in places (the woman's arms in panel 4 are WAY too skinny, for example), but I get the impression that that isn't from a lack of skill on your part (she's fine in panels 6 and 7). How much time do you spend on constructing the figures before going on to the line work? I get the impression you maybe just need to do an extra draft at this stage, to make sure all the proportions are correct. It's annoying and feels like a chore, but it's totally worth it when you see the finished work (I always take three passes at my stuff before inking- one stick-figure type rough for composition, one loose pencil version, and then a much tighter version where I do all the hard shit like tightening up perspective and fixing anatomy. I then doi my inks in two stages- line work, then shading- and then the final stage is looking at the finished piece and going "Oh my god what a pile of shit, look at all the mistakes I missed...").

Ariel S. comic is better than the shitty Comics Critics featured here.

You stay classy, JackKing.

I want to get critiques because I feel that's one of the best ways to notice mistakes or things that need correction, and I know that people around here really say what they think, so why not?

@JackKing: Thank you... i guess! (Actually, I love the Comic Critics strips!)

@hangmanjury: Thanks! ^__^

@Blackjak: Thanks! I think that the web provides many advantages that should be taken into account, and unlimited vertical scrolling is one of the best.

@Rob: Thanks a lot for the advice! I've got a lot to improve, specially in my figure work, but sometimes it's hard for me to notice specifically what needs improving! So thank you for pointing it out for me I'll keep producing then ^__^

But that stuff's all gravy and comes to you with time. Keep producing and you'll be just fine!

Joke works too! Simple, yet effective! Thumbs up from me!