The Biggest Superhero Films That Didn't Happen, Part 2
Comic Books, Film
Random Thought! As a result of Thanksgiving and illness, no post last week. It’s random thoughts time! Get excited!
Random Thought! The news that Warren Ellis’s Gravel has been optioned for a movie with Ellis doing the first draft of the screenplay (at least) and acting as executive producer is interesting news — if only because I’m trying to figure out which story they would want to actually adapt. I love the comics, but none of the stories themselves seem to be movie material exactly — but I could be wrong. The short nature of each story in the original minis or the serialised nature of the current story makes me think the concept would work better on TV — HBO or Showtime or whatever. Combat magician kicking ass, fucking shit up… I’d watch that. Also, oddly, I could see an adaptation of Strange Kiss or Stranger Kisses working (or being allowed) on TV where it wouldn’t on film. And, come on, Strange Kiss is the perfect way to introduce this concept. Then again, maybe they’ll go the route of an original story that geared to the medium. Or, as Ellis put it in a Bad Signal last week:
The GRAVEL screenplay… there’s a phrase I never expected to type. In one way, it lets me look at the whole ten years of Gravel stories in a whole new light – AS a whole, in fact, that I can pick and choose from to build a new story. On the other hand, there’s a lot of them… and I imagine my favourite, STRANGER KISSES, is a bit hardcore for straight adaptation. As well as short.
So, I guess we’ll see. I am looking forward to it.
Random Thought! Reread reviews are on hold for a little bit as I catch up on other things and gear up for a big idea/project I have planned for November here.
Random Thought! Been thinking about ‘The Kafka Gambit’ and how that little move shows that Joe Casey understands comics more than a lot of other people. Is it selfish to take your characters off the board? Some would say yes, some would say that you don’t own your characters or intellectual property, that once it’s released it ceases to be yours, it belongs to the world, and clinging to it is immature, and short-sighted, and selfish, and just get over yourself, because the rest of us aren’t blessed with creativity, and the ability to actually think up shit ourselves, so we need to take what you did, and then claim that it’s our right, because fuck it it is. But, yeah, you can probably guess how I feel about that. Casey has seen characters appropriated by others who claim that they love them and read everything featuring them before and have waited eversolong to use them and… then, they produce godfuckingawful stories that show, clearly, they did not read those previous stories and, if they did, they did not understand them at all. Sure, they may have understood the words, but there’s this thing called ‘subtext’ and, I know, that’s not everyone’s bag and we shouldn’t all be so concerned with what things mean, we should all just enjoy the ride and why does everything have to have some hidden ‘meaning’ that no one gets… but… fuck it, you’re stupid then. Grant Morrison has the opposite view: he tosses little ideas out into the world all of the time, just waiting for someone to pick them up and how’s that been working for everyone so far? How well did Marvel use Warren Ellis’s Extremis armour upgrade idea for Iron Man? ‘The Kafka Gambit’ should be manditory.
Random Thought! The Splash Page returned yet again this weekend in a discussion that grew out of one of these posts.
Random Thought! Bill asks: “What was the best last issue you ever read? Last, as in, final. As in, there were no more to follow. As in, the opposite of first.” Automatic Kafka #9, Preacher #66, and Transmetroplitan #60 are the three that spring to mind. The Invisibles volume 3 #1 would also be a contender, but more in that ‘honourable mention’ sort of way. I would include some mentions of final issues on runs of titles that continued, but none are coming to mind as anywhere near the ones I’ve mentioned already. That’s a hard three-way tie to break, because each is a favourite for different reasons… I like the ideas in Kafka, the heart in Preacher, and the heart in Transmet, too… Ah, I’ll go Automatic Kafka #9.
Random Thought! I kind of want to be called the Rated R Reviewing Star… it’s a stretch and kind of stupid, but I like it. Finally, Curran has a good idea! (Of course, it’s one that involves ripping someone off, but that’s what he does…) Also, I just went ahead and made that the title of an altered reviewing thing on my blog.
Random Thought! Sometimes, I hate that writing “SHITTY FUCKING COMIC DON’T BUY AVOID LIKE THE PLAGUE SHIT SHIT SHIT VERY VERY BAD GODFUCKINGAWFUL” a few dozen times doesn’t count as a ‘professional’ review despite that being the most accurate way to describe certain comics.
Random Thought! Anyone else looking forward/dreading The Authority: The Lost Year, the continuation/completition of the Grant Morrison run by Keith Giffen? I really, really enjoyed those first two issues (the first issue being one of my favourite superhero comics that year), but Keith Giffen has burned me before. His writing is very hit or miss for me and nothing about it has ever suggested him as a guy to finish a Grant Morrison story. But, I can’t deny that I want to see what the book is like. But, as Vanja pointed out to me once, why not take the chance to bring back Joe Casey and Dustin Nguyen to finish Wildcats Version 3.0 since its sales when it was cancelled were higher than the current sales of Wildstorm titles? Even give it a ‘clever’ title like “Wildcats Version 3.1″ or something. That’s if Casey would want to, of course.
Random Thought! Am I the only one who would find the current Batgirl series more entertaining if it actually continued to present Stephanie Brown as a fuck-up who shouldn’t be a superhero? Sometimes, people suck at stuff and continue on anyway… that’s interesting to me. Besides, it teaches children a valuable lesson: follow your dreams unless you are godawful at fulfilling them and following them results in a shitload of people dying. Then, find a new dream. I’m all for the ‘you can do anything you want’ lesson, but, sometimes, it’s good to point out that not everyone can do everything and it’s irresponsible to think otherwise. Okay, so I shouldn’t write children’s books, I get it. (And I suggest using Stephanie Brown for that story because everything about her fits that story. Nothing to do with her being a woman since I’d support that story with a man, too. I didn’t write the years of comics showing her as a very poor urban vigilante that starts gang wars…)
Random Thought! Horribly wrong thought of the day: Black Lantern Julius Schwartz. Hey, he appeared in some DC comics…
Random Thought! The one thing that could make Blackest Night almost awesome: Black Lantern Darkseid. Except he would continue to just be Darkseid as he’s too powerful to be controlled by jewelry.
Random Thought! Seriously, Dark Wolverine #79… very, very bad.
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