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She Has No Head! – The 12 Comic Wishes Of Kelly’s Birthday Post…

Yep, today’s my birthday.

Kelly Thompson r1

I must have these boots IRL

You can figure out how old I am by figuring out how many columns I’ve done for She Has No Head! and then subtracting ten.  I WISH!  Yeah, no, it’s just the number of columns…no subtraction.  Man I’m old. ANYWAY…

Inspired in part by Chad Nevett’s always fun Random Thoughts and my sincere desire not to do a big serious post on my birthday…I bring you a list of 12 comics related ways in which I would like to bend the universe to my will in honor of ME.  Also, some cool shit I want people to buy for me.

Birds Of Prey 3 Cover by Cliff Chiang

Cliff Chiang Penciled Birds Of Prey...SO AWESOME

1. I want Cliff Chiang drawing Gail Simone’s new Birds of Prey.  Because covers like this make me ache for it.  ACHE for it.  And while I’m asking for the world let’s just throw in the awesome Dave Stewart coloring it.  Yeah, let’s make that’s #1a.

She-Hulk And Puppets

In fairness, this panel is actually by James Harren, but the joke is too good not to share (again).

2. A monthly ongoing Heralds title – headed by Kathryn Immonen and Tonci Zonjic.  In a perfect world I’d keep the same female leads (because I’m crazy for the lot of them and I think Immonen has really nailed the voices) but the reality is that Heralds could also work well with a rotating cast if you simply kept Immonen and Zonjic and “strong female leads” as the constants.  Could totally work Marvel.  And I would buy the shit out of that book (and probably write about it constantly).  Get on it.


"Rogue...you are in control of that zipper...zip it up!" "What's that you say? Some dudes are drawing you like that against your will...I'll be right back, just have to get my baseball bat"

3. Let’s just get this one out of the way.  I want a moratorium on the unzipped to somewhere below my boobs costume that is all the rage all of a sudden (and by all of a sudden I mean for the last damn year).  I suppose we can still have that costume if it TRULY fits the character…off the top of my head…I can see Emma Frost doing that, maybe Poison Ivy (although it would make more sense for Ivy to just be naked or something)…but Rogue, Black Widow, Catwoman, etc. …there just aren’t character reason for these ladies to be falling out of their suits.

While we’re here and talking about this…let’s cut back on ALL the lady costume ridiculousness…fewer thongs and bare midriffs; fewer stilettos and fishnets; fewer miniskirts and boob holes; fewer of all of the things that just don’t make any sense for a superhero to wear to fight crime and seem arbitrarily foisted on the ladies regardless of personality.  It’s a small step towards leveling the superhero playing field (with many more bigger steps to follow) but getting the costumes to a place of more equality between men and women would be a good start.  Maybe then we could start tackling the bigger stuff.


4. I want Batwoman #1 to rock my goddamn socks off.  Yes, Rucka set the bar ridiculously high with his Detective Comics #854 – #860 run, but this is still the marquee female book I’ve been waiting for my whole life and the creative team is both excellent and seems well thought out.  Williams having the foresight to bring on Amy Reeder as an artist for the second arc sounds like a man that knows his time limitations and is determined not to disappoint fans or do a disservice to the character.  My hopes are high.  Please be good, please be good, please be good!!! 4a. Rucka and J.H. Williams III’s collected Batwoman Detective Comics run, Elegy, comes out in hardcover this week (or next?) and despite owning all the original issues, I want it real bad.


5. Speaking of Rucka.  Rucka!  Where is my Stumptown #4?!  I want my Stumptown #4!  Give it to meeeee!!!

Wednesday Comics Hardcover

So beautiful...want...

6. I’m totally salivating over the new collected Wednesday Comics.  Have you guys seen this 11 x 17 hardcover edition?  BEAUTIFUL.  I love the newsprint originals and will have them my whole life, barring a natural disaster of some kind, but this collection of some of the best and most gorgeous comics I’ve read in years is absolutely stunning.  The thing about Wednesday Comics that I believe was a real stroke of genius on editor  Mark Chiarello’s part is that he approached some of the best writers and artists in the industry and asked them what story would they tell if they could tell ANY story.  And the result are stories of incredible quality, creativity, and fun – which is the result you usually get when you turn insanely talented people loose to do what they are passionate about.  I talk about WC in more detail here if you’re interested, but all you really need to know is that if you haven’t read Wednesday Comics yet, you should do so now, and the hardcover collected edition is a beautiful way to do it.  While we’re talking about Wednesday Comics, I’ll add that I want a second edition – I know it almost killed Chiarello, but maybe it’s been long enough that he can forget that fact and serve up some more genius for next summer perhaps?  Mr. Chiarello?  Please!

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Cass Cain

You say you'll be back Cass...BUT WHEN!?!?!

7. Cassandra Cain’s triumphant return to comics.  DC, if you need some ideas…if THAT’S the hold up…give me a call, I got me ideas up the wazoo.


Stephanie Buscema's 5 Minute Marvels


Cate, Grace, and Tim's 5 Minute Marvels

8. I want 5 Minute Marvels to continue slowly taking over the world with its awesomeness.  Tim Miner and his two daughters Grace (6) and Cate (5) started 5 Minute Marvels as a family activity – simply drawing superheroes together for five minutes every night before bed.  When Tim turned their efforts into a super fun blog and started getting talented comics creators to contribute their own five minute drawings, things really started to take off.  Tons of artists have not only drawn with their own kids, but also “drawn with Grace and Cate” (including me, though the word artist should be used very loosely in my case).  You can find everyone from Colleen Coover, Ross Campbell, and David Lopez to Ming Doyle and Stephanie Buscema on there.  5 Minute Marvels has also been featured on major comics websites like Robot 6, Pop Candy, Comics Alliance, and even on Wired, Ain’t It Cool and the local news.  But beyond all that, it’s really just a simple idea that I can’t think of anything I’m more on board with than getting young girls (and boys too of course) interested in comics and art in such a positive way.

I expect Grace and Cate to be taking over the world in whatever way they choose any minute now.


Whedon & Cassaday's Astonishing X-Men Omnibus...gorgeous...which one of you is going to get it for me?

9. Ahem.  This one’s a little embarrassing…because I asked for it way back in December of 2009 and I can’t help but notice that none of you have stepped up and purchased it for me.  Yes, that’s right I’m STILL waiting for my Astonishing X-Men Ominbus.  C’mon…one of you needs to take one for the team already and get this to me so we don’t have to talk about this again six months from now…

DV8 Team

Brian Wood and Rebekah Isaac's take on DV8

10. I want Wildstorm to extend Brian Wood’s work with DV8 (assuming he wants that of course).  I think Wood has done a brilliant job updating the DV8 characters for 2010 and I’ve love to see an ongoing series headed by Wood, and in my perfect universe we’d keep Fiona Staples and Rebekah Isaacs on board as well as their work thus far has been pitch perfect.


If this is Campbell's take on Kitty Pryde, imagine what he could do with X-23? Awesome

11. I’d like mainstream comics, superhero or otherwise, to open its doors (and eyes?) to more independent creators.  I’m sure you’ve noticed that most of this list trends pretty mainstream…it’s not because I don’t have love for independent stuff, it’s because independent comics are already doing things I love on a regular basis, and I’d like to see more of that in mainstream comics. Off the top of my head I’d love to see Ross Campbell’s take on some X-Men or maybe the new upcoming X-23 series.


Wolverine dreams of frolicking with deer? Sign me up!

I’d like to see Faith Erin Hicks do whatever the hell she wants after reading this hilarious cartoon-y take on Wolverine.  I’d like to see more art (consistently, not just random mini-series and one-shots) from artists like Fiona Staples, Rebekah Isaacs, Tonci Zonjic, Emma Rios, Colleen Coover, and Les McClaine.  After Stephanie Buscema’s excellent Dr. Doom story in Girl Comics #2, I’d like to see her let loose in a similar way to Hicks – doing just about anything she wants.  How about an ongoing The Question series starring Renee Montoya, drawn by Cully Hamner?  If we could get Rucka back I’d say hell yeah…but is anyone else up to the task? I don’t know.  Marc Andreyko did great things with Manhunter this past year in the Streets Of Gotham co-feature…maybe he’s our man to continue Renee’s story?

Really this all just adds up to I’d just like more FUN in mainstream comics. I’d like mainstream comics to take more chances and do more crazy off the wall things that aren’t so serious and mired in continuity…things that are risky but exciting and fun.  Things that don’t look like EVERY SINGLE THING I’ve already seen FIFTY TIMES BEFORE.  And one of the keys to that is giving great creators that mostly live outside of that world, a chance to come in and put their own spin on something.

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fiona staples

If I can't live in a world where this pink flying vespa thing actually exists, I want to at least live in a world where I find images like this (from Fiona Staple's website) in my comics!

While I’m on this tear, I’d like both Marvel and DC to give a project like Minx another try…hopefully with a little more dedication, time, and money.  It’s entirely possible that girls won’t come even if you DO build it…but they’re certainly not going to come if you don’t even bother building it.  And whoever manages to get them (the women and their 50% of the population), will reap massive benefits – financial and beyond.  It’s a big prize to win, and big prizes don’t come easy.

Now that I’ve finally discovered all-ages books (thank you The Muppets and Tiny Titans and Thor & The Warriors Four) I’d like to see more books that are definitively for kids and more books that are definitively for adults – and fewer that try to straddle that line unsuccessfully – thus making a lot of really mediocre books that appeal to neither group.

Whew…I asked for like 65 things there…but we’re counting that as ONE giant wish…since it all has the same theme behind it, i.e. “better more interesting fun comics that do things I’ve never seen before”.  :)

12. Oh, and I wish I was as badass looking in real life as I am in my sweet Scott Pilgrim Avatar.

Universe make it so!


Happy birthday, and a great list! I wholeheartedly agree with most of the points, especially the parts about:

-More Wednesday Comics! The hardcover is mind-bogglingly gorgeous, and I don’t even care that its giant size means that it’s been sitting on my couch for a few weeks because it won’t fit on any of my shelves.
-More Tonci Zonjic! More Colleen Coover! More Fiona Staples! More Faith Erin Hicks!
-More Heralds! Well, I’d be fine with just more Kathryn Immonen and Tonci Zonjic projects, really. Ideally, I’d like Immonen to get more projects that don’t feel like Marvel’s “Let’s throw female creators a bone, but only with female characters! We can call it Women of Marvel, ZING!” attitude. I love that she’s getting more consistent work, but it still feels like it’s in the ghetto of what Marvel editors feel a woman can and should write, especially with the Women of Marvel feature interview that basically asks her nothing except about what female characters she likes.

I never particularly liked Cassandra Cain, but I thought that she got shortchanged by the new Batman Reborn status quo, where she basically said, “I’m leaving! See you later, Stephanie!” and hasn’t been heard from or talked about since. I don’t personally clamour for her “triumphant return”, but I’d at least like her to be revisited now and then.

Happy Birthday!

quick question about number 11, who do you think is doing a better job at it right now? I like to think Marvel is more open to it for its mainstream comics (Hickman comes to mind on a writers standpoint, mostly in S.H.I.E.L.D. and parts of Secret Warriors with his graphs), while DC has it mostly for Vertigo.

Tom Fitzpatrick

June 28, 2010 at 10:42 am

Happy B-Day, Ms. Thompson.

You don’t look a day over 25-ish. ;-)

For your b-day, I’d love to give you my e-mail address, in which we could embark on a torrid e-affair, if you so desire. ;-)

[…] new SHE HAS NO HEAD! is up.  A special birthday post of 12 comics related things I want in order to bend the universe […]

Great post!

As an addendum to #3, let’s just put all the X-Men back in their Jim Lee suits. Each one fits the character perfectly and looks really cool. Cyclops is no longer prone to jokes about being a giant dick in a giant condom! Plus, those are the iconic suits to a generation of twenty-somethings with disposable income that the comic companies should be courting.

Happy B-Day Miss Kell….and so now I know to try and avoid Jim Hanley’s and Midtown Comics this week because of drunken female comic fans rampaging in the aftermath of your b-day blowout….HA!

Between 5 minute marvels and that axecop stuff..the next generation and future of comics looks bright….

I may not agree with you on Heralds but I have to eat some crow..a lot of the female driven books have been pretty good…(although i disliked Her-oes with a passion)

hmm More indie creators on mainstream books..? That would be cool…if their indie fanbases would accept them working on mainstream titles.

Kelly gets the Ast. X-Men Omnibus…she might break her keyboard and computer frantically writing opinions on it…LOL

Happy birthday, Kelly. I expect to hear of portions of Brooklyn burned down by awesome tonight.

I, too, would like to see Cliff Chiang drawing Birds of Prey. Up ’til now, it was just “dear God, anyone but Benes,” but you’ve won me over to your side.

Don’t you have a boyfriend? Twist his arm, get him to buy you that nifty X-Men omnibus. I don’t know about these other guys, but I’m broke.

Happy birthday, Kelly! I haven’t counted your columns but I’m pretty sure you’re younger than I am.

Happy birthday! And you’re a whole run of Wednesday Comics younger than I am, so no, you aren’t old.

You know, based on all of your wonderful comments on Batwoman, I may break down and buy the hardcover rather than frustratingly waiting for the softcover. I don’t often buy monthly books anymore but I still pick up collections of things that look interesting or have been highly praised.

13. I want yet another egocentric, needy, lesbian-leaning blog, so I can have nameless, faceless, personal-interactionless readers tell me I’m okay! Classless.

That being said 1.) i agree 2.)can’t see why not 3.)TITTIES people. Say it with me… TITTIES! 4.)can’t see why not (lezbo) 5.)i think someone really does need to give it to yooooooou! 6.)YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY 100% CORRECT(there happy birthday)7.)mmmmmmm… not feelin’ it 8.)never evn heard of this, but it sound absolutely lovely 9.)This is the one that me to respond

provoked that is: I want, I want, I want! Really. Classless.10.)Brian Woods good 11.)There is a reason why they’re called indie(although that Cambell cover does look good) 12.) Don’t we all.

and before Dean, or Bill Reed, or whatever applepolisher get’s their cockles in a bunch to defend the birthday girl, let me just say … Fuck off.

Wow. I even get pointless jackass trolls on my jokey birthday post. Talk about classless.

ETA: So your main complaint is that I said “I want” too much in a post in which the premise is “12 Comics Related Things I Want”? Okay, whatever you say.

I have an Astonishing X-men Omnibus I’ve already read several times. I can totally send it to you.


Happy Birthday

I, too would adore some Wednesday comics, but am low on unds

I really can’t have someone talking to one of my writers like that, azjohnson5.

Disagreements are fine, but you’re going way over the line into just trolling Kelly.

So, you can either apologize (and cut it out) or you can just not comment here anymore.

Danielle Leigh

June 28, 2010 at 2:42 pm

Happy Birthday! I love making birthday wishes like this because sometimes the universe actually hears you and complies. I hope as many wishes as possible come true!

Matthew Southworth

June 28, 2010 at 2:55 pm

Hi Kelly, and happy happy birthday!

I haven’t had a chance to read your whole column this week yet, but here’s why:

Stumptown 4 is a-coming. . .I’m the one responsible for the delay this time around, and I’m hoping to be done in the next couple of weeks if at all possible. So I apologize for the delay but think it will be worth the wait–I’m happier with the first half of this issue than I have been with anything I’ve done in the other issues.

If you’re in San Diego in a few weeks, please come by the Oni booth and I’ll do you a birthday sketch. Thanks for all the kind words about Stumptown. . .and by the way, I say more more more Tonci Zonjic!

lol So Kelly right away gets an answer to her Stumptown wish….. Damn this site is powerful….

(psst some CBR writer on their next birthday, wish for Bill Watterson to do a new Calvin and Hobbes project next!!!)


Happy Birthday Kelly

And remember, growing old may be mandatory, but growing up is always optional.

“let’s just put all the X-Men back in their Jim Lee suits. Each one fits the character perfectly and looks really cool.”

Yes! We need more straps and pouches! And weird half-mask things that let us see their beautiful hair! And thong underwear! And brown leather jackets over spandex! And ponytails!

Mike Loughlin

June 28, 2010 at 4:52 pm

Happy birthday!

0. Happy Birthday!

1. I would totally buy BoP if Cliff Chiang was the artist. I’d buy just about anything if Cliff Chiang was the artist, in fact.

2. I’d also buy just about any ongoing if Kathryn Immonen was the writer. Man, I miss Runaways.

3. Since Rogue has better control of her powers, it makes some degree of sense that she’d be more comfortable in her skin, but, yeah, the front zipper phenomenon has gotten ridiculous recently.

4. If anyone can exceed expectations, it’s JH Williams III. I’m very curious to see how Amy Reeder will fit in.

5. I really need to check out Stumptown. A trade is surely forthcoming, right?

6. Wednesday Comics was a mixed bag for me. It had some great highs (Kerchl’s Flash being the highest of the highs), but it also had a lot of middling middles and low lows. In the end, I think I only liked maybe four of the stories. The collection should be damn pretty, though.

7. I’m afraid, if DC brought Cassandra Cain back now, it’d be to kill her.

8. How did I not know about 5 Minute Marvels? That’s awesome.

9. Was the Astonishing omnibus available during the fabled Amazon Glitch? ‘Cause that would’ve been the time to buy.

10. I hope somebody does something with DV8 after the current mini wraps. If it’s Wood, Isaacs, and Staples, all the better. Hell, have them spearhead a whole new direction for the Wildstorm Universe. Wood has a keen eye for talent and a ton of connections, including…

11. …a whole host of indy creators, who would do wonders for the Wildstorm imprint. More fun, offbeat comics are always welcome.

12. That is a bad ass Scott Pilgrim avatar.

Happy birthday, Kelly.

And Apodaca said it much better all that I wanted to say about those “wonderful” Jim Lee costumes.

Wow! Thanks for the 5 Minute Marvels shout out, Kel! That puts us in amazing company.

To show our thanks, here’s some birthday art from Grace and me!


All good things,

Tim Miner

P.S. Hear, hear, Brian!

AzJohnson, find something better to do with your time.

@Apodaca: Scott has only had two costumes that don’t have the silly body condom look, the Lee and Quitely suits. I do like the Quitely-era suits the best, but I can live with the Jim Lee ones. Rogue and Storm had great full body suits. Gambit looked weird, but in a cool way. Colossus, Angel, and Wolverine didn’t really change, but their suits were great already. The only one I didn’t really like was Jean, so I guess I should change that to all living X-Men.

Matthew Southworth

June 29, 2010 at 1:20 am

Re: Ian A’s question–yes indeed, there is a Stumptown trade coming at some point. The book is told in four-issue arcs–each “case” of Dex’s is an arc, and each arc will come out as a trade. The issues are long, between 27 and 36 pages each, so the book will be reasonably thick. Plus there’s a LOT of backup material. . .

“Gambit looked weird, but in a cool way.”

This kind of undermines your argument.

Happy Birthday! And many, many more (happy ones, I mean, so you don’t think I’m wishing you get *really* old – like me…)
Hope many of your wishes here come true; as for Wednesday Comics, I’m hoping for a tpb; those hardcovers, beautiful as they may be, are too spendy for me. And thanks so much for the link to 5 Minute Marvels. That is truly awesome! And those sketches by Stephanie Buscema make me wish for someone to do a Marvel equivalent of Cooke’s New Frontier, with her doing the art!

@Apo: How? Weird doesn’t always equal bad. Beast always looks weird, and he’s awesome.

[…] I did a fun birthday bit on She Has No Head! yesterday.  And already Matt Southworth is helping my wishes come to […]

Thanks everyone for the birthday wishes!

@Matt Southworth: Thanks so much for stopping in. And for giving us information about issue #4 (I’m sure it will be well worth the wait) and the upcoming trade(s). Unfortunately I won’t be at SDCC this year (probably next year) but thanks for the birthday sketch offer! :)

@Tom Fitzpatrick: In fairness, that picture was taken a couple years ago. For all else…email me ;)

@Marvel Smartass: Thanks for the birthday sketches – so great!

@Jeremy: If you’re serious, send me an email and we’ll talk! :) 1979semifinalist[at]gmail[dot]com.

Personal Confession time…. Laugh if you want..but I really wanted as a kid the Spider-Mobile or Captain America’s Sky-Cycle…..

It a shame that those vehicles have been “forgotten”…so you aren’t the only one Kelly….Someone give Fiona like a 5 million dollar grant and an inventor think tank a la Futurama to make a few of these babies!!! =)

A little belated “Happy Birthday!” wishes.

I, too, am a big fan of Ross Campbell (even when he was starting out & doing artwork for the ‘Exalted’ pen-&-paper RPG from White Wolf) & would very much like him doing anything, anything at all really.

And as X-23 is one of my fave characters, i more than thumbs-up your idea, yay.

Ditto for Faith Erin Hicks & every other of your wishes come to think of it.

P.S. Have been reading all your columns but i think this might be the first time actually commenting.

[…] I stand by my desire to have an ongoing Heralds book helmed by Immonen and Zonjic. With either this cast, or a rotating cast of ladies…I don’t care.  I think Immonen and Zonjic could deliver a monthly book that I’d adore.  I certainly would buy (and blog) the hell out of it if this was a taste of what it could be. […]

[…] 6, 2010 in art, artists, cliff chiang, comics As if I needed further proof that Cliff Chiang IS the perfect Birds of Prey artist, I came across this awesome Chiang Black Canary drawing.  Oh to live in a world where Chiang draws […]

It’s all your fault, Kelly. I just ordered the Batwoman: Elegy hardcover without ever having read any of the current Batwoman’s stories. But i’m not worried, I trust your opinion on this!

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