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CSBG Archive

Comics Are Awesome #36

Sunday Brunch will not be served today. Instead, viddy this, o my brothers:

The secret origin of Grant Morrison!


Omar Karindu, with the power of SUPER-hypocrisy!

September 5, 2010 at 8:42 am

Or Bizarro Silver Age Lex Luthor

Also Brian Bendis and Brian K. Vaughan.

Add in David Finch too I think. Give him a goatee and you have Didio. Isn’t Brian Wood also Bald?

I thought Professor X immediately.

Isn’t Brian Azzarello the third part of the “Three Bald Brians from Cleveland”?

I want my Sunday Brunch!

“Barry! You were to be my leading man in our next picture! Why did you ruin your good looks?”

(other possible answers:)

1. My name isn’t Barry, you dummy! It’s Lex.
2. My name isn’t Barry, you dummy, it’s Bruce Willis. And bald worked for me in all the Die Hards, so shut up!
3. But dear, our next movie is the biography of Yul Brynner!
4. Because you gave me head lice — and we’re cutting all YOUR hair off next!
5. If you think this looks funny, wait till you see where else is shaved!

“I dare not tell you, Gloria, but I must keep my skull shaven until the day I die!”

While everybody else is looking at the bald guy, my reaction was that Gloria reminds me of movie star Rita Farr.

Do we know who did this cover?

@The Watcher, Bruce Willis was only bald in the last two Die Hards.

Mike: The Grand Comics Database says the cover is by Bob Brown, who was the fill-in artist for Doom Patrol. Good eye.

Willis wasn’t that bald in With a Vengeance. John McClane is a Reverse Samson– the balder he gets, the more indestructible he becomes.

Makes you wonder what it was like to work in DC back in the day, when the covers were full of this passive-aggressive lack of communication. Is it a symptom of the workplace? “You’re fired, and I don’t dare to tell you why!” “I spilled this bottle of ink over the page you just finished, but it’s for your own good!” “This script needs a rewrite, but I can’t tell you what’s wrong with it!”

I find that people don’t use the phrase “I don’t dare tell you why” often enough in everyday life.

This is a common misconception. Morrison doesn’t hate all hair, just facial hair. The guy on that cover must be an impostor.

I know AS is making a funny, but I think it is a workplace thing. Or maybe just my workplace.

Are these Awesome comics from your collection, Bill, or just you looking at the Grand Comics Database?

I think they’ve all been from the Grand Comics Database, which is a fine website that all right-thinking comics aficionados should frequent.

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