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CSBG Archive

I Love Ya But You’re Strange – Erotica, Williams-Sonoma Style

Every week, I will spotlight strange but ultimately endearing comic stories (basically, we’re talking lots and lots of Silver Age comic books). Here is the archive of all the installments of this feature. Feel free to e-mail me at bcronin@comicbookresources.com if you have a suggestion for a future installment!

Today we look at a brilliant story arc from Chris Onstad’s wonderful web comic, Achewood, where, through an interesting turn of events, one of the characters begins to write erotica for the upscale kitchenware/houseware/furniture retail business, Williams-Sonoma. It is as awesome as it sounds (and it has about as much profanity as you would expect, as well, so be forewarned before you read on!).

The storyline began in July 2009, when Ray (who is always looking to make a quick buck) discovers his friend Cornelius (who is a refined gentlemen who also will write more or less anything, including tawdry romance novels) in the midst of one such tawdry romance novel. Ray then strikes upon an idea (that Ray is a cat and Cornelius is a bear is immaterial to the story)…

Amazingly bizarre.

Click here to read what happens next! It gets a whoooooooole lot stranger.

(Note: This article first appeared as part of the Fools of April feature – BC)


Ray’s assertion in the first strip puts images of Martha Stewart in my head that I didn’t want there.

Oh man, I love Achewood. Onstad does such a great job setting bizarre events like this and giving all his characters such distinct voices. I love T’s lines a couple comics after this.

So glad Onstad is able to sporadically continue posting.

One of the greatest storylines from one of the greatest comics of all time. No matter how many times I reread these strips, or The Great Outdoor Fight, they never get old. I just need to know – is Teodor still in the van???

I’m surprised nobody’s trying this for real.

Aaron, Nice Pete booted Teodor out of the van around September of 2010. I think he’s only shown up a few times since then, but he appears to be none the worse for the ordeal.

Achewood. Nice.

Throwing in my Achewood support. So great.

One is a cat? They sure do both look like bears.

One is a cat? They sure do both look like bears.

You actually got me to re-check, because it has been so long since I’ve paid attention to exactly which animal each character is, but yes, Ray is indeed a cat.

I tried to follow it past this point but it just got a little too strange and existential for me. But I loved this to bits. It’s genius. Especially when Williams steps in and writes, “Allow me to show you how it is done in the big leagues, young man”

Right? That just takes it to a whole other level.

It’s the note on Sapphic writing by a 100 year-old man: “Do you see what I’m doing here? I’m setting a scene. I’m not just banging body parts together until God summons the locusts, which seems to be your approach.” that sends me into paroxysms of laughter every time I see it.

One is a cat? They sure do both look like bears.
It’s the rounded ears. Ray is an American Curl, thus his unusual ear-shape.

“She grabbed her tits”.

I spat out my yogurt reading that, and now am simultaneously attempting to clean my table, type this out, and stop laughing like and idiot!

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