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I Love Ya But You’re Strange – That Time Evil Baby Lois Lane Tried to Force Baby Superman to Marry Her

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Every week, I will spotlight strange but ultimately endearing comic stories (basically, we’re talking lots and lots of Silver Age comic books). Here is the archive of all the installments of this feature. Feel free to e-mail me at bcronin@comicbookresources.com if you have a suggestion for a future installment!

Today is the 100th installment of I Love Ya But You’re Strange (because of this event, no Abandoned an’ Forsaked this week. The next A&F is also #100 and I didn’t want two 100th installments the same week. So I Love Ya But You’re Strange moved up to Saturday and A&F got the week off. A different feature will take A&F’s spot tomorrow). In honor of the occasion, I will give you all one of the craziest comic book stories you’ll see this month (perhaps this year…perhaps this decade!), the time that evil baby Lois Lane tried to force baby Superman to marry her. All courtesy of

I actually don’t know who wrote this story (from Superman’s Girl Friend, Lois Lane #42). The great Kurt Schaffenberger drew it, though.

It opens with Lois Lane revealing a plot to learn Superman’s secret identity by rigging a device to take his photograph while he was changing…

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Man, Schaffenberger always NAILED those Lois Lane smirks. I love how she’s actually taunting Superman. The dude can just grab that shit right off your belt, Lois, without you even finishing saying “Hey, stop that!”

Anyhow, things were going normal enough until Lois suffers a terrible brain injury…

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Gotta love those concussions that turn you evil!!

I love how sad Superman is when he thinks this is just Lois being Lois…

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I also love how Superman’s plan is “I am sure she is so nosy that she’s BOUND to do something stupid like spray herself with some alien spray she doesn’t know anything about”…

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But don’t you dare underestimate Lois Lane, Superman!

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The rest of the story is Lois taking them to different places that would be willing to marry them despite their age (including a blind justice of the peace that was friends with Lois) with Superman continually foiling each of the plots (he performs Super-surgery on the justice to cure his blindness). While they’re doing this, the sprays are making them younger and younger until finally…

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Is that perhaps the greatest story ever told?

It might be. It just might be.

36 Comments

Why is Lois not bothered by Superman’s confession that he doesn’t love her? He tells her that he thought she only wanted him to propose if he loved her – since he’s not proposing that means he doesn’t love her!
But, yes, this is an amazing warped astonishing unbelieveably wonderous story!

Well no, he does love her, but there’s that ‘threat to the wifey’ thing.

Oh, and congratulations and thanks, Brian.

Love this story. Gorgeous art by Schaffenberger. According to the Superman in the Sixties collection, Leo Dorfman is the writer.

Haven’t read this one, yet…gonna have to get to it. I’ve been crushing through SA Superman, Jimmy Olsen, and Lois the last couple of years…I never am disappointed by how awesome it all is…

So the judge rules that it’s perfectly legal to marry two people who are “temporarily changed” to babies? Because it’s obvious that an alien rejuvenation spray isn’t permanent and doesn’t affect an adult’s ability to consent? But the minister can’t go through with the ceremony because Lois can’t say “I do”?

News flash to baby Lois: A religious ceremony has no legal standing. The “I do” vows are merely a ritual, not a binding contract. She and Superbaby could go to City Hall and get married in a civil ceremony.

Michael Sacal

May 18, 2013 at 10:27 am

Like > “Da fug?!”

So, wait, as far as the marriage license bureau clerk is aware Lois is actually in her early teens, while Superman is obviously in his late twenties or early thirties… and he only disapproves of their attempt to get married because it wouldn’t work? That is really messed-up.

So, Superman’s plan to teach Lois a lesson is to convince people that he’s a pedophile?

Everytime I think the Silver Age couldn’t get any weirder, I’m proven wrong again.

talk about kind of crazy for not only does lois due to a head injury use black mail to marry superman but in the end they wind up due to lois messing with some stuff she should have left alone wind up where they are n’t even able to say i do because they are aged to babies and haven’t learned to talk yet.

Wait, the spray’s aura also shrinks clothes appropriately as you de-age… so why exactly did Lois change into a little girl outfit?

Now I wanna go back and reread that Astro City issue with the Superman & Lois analogues.

Wait, the spray’s aura also shrinks clothes appropriately as you de-age… so why exactly did Lois change into a little girl outfit?

Superman convinced her to do it. He knew her changing into a little girl outfit would make her look even younger.

Heh, I have this issue in my collection.

“And I challenge this baby to deny that he’s Superman!”

Being a lawyer in the Silver Age DC Universe has to be pretty weird…

Jeez, Superman totally snubbed Bat-baby in favor of Jimmy Olsen as best man. Even as an infant, he’s still a dickhead!

Issue number?

Travis Pelkie

May 19, 2013 at 2:31 am

Drunken Fist, it was probably Lucy Lane that convinced Jimmy to be best man. “C’mon, my baby sister is getting married to baby Superman, and we can push the strollers down the aisle!”

They have some weird ass double dates.

Commander Benson

May 19, 2013 at 3:14 am

Frankly, I couldn’t detect any change in Lois’ personality after the concussion. The Silver-Age Lois Lane was always a selfish, self-centered shrew.

The real mystery is why Superman didn’t take an extra few seconds to make sure his Clark Kent clothes were properly compressed during one of the many times Lois was falling to her death. That would have prevented a great many future headaches for him.

Today this would be a 5 issue mini-series.

Face Palm Silver Age Defense Shield at maximum power!
crud….Face Palm shield disintegrating under onslaught of the giggles.

@FS7:

So, wait, as far as the marriage license bureau clerk is aware Lois is actually in her early teens, while Superman is obviously in his late twenties or early thirties… and he only disapproves of their attempt to get married because it wouldn’t work? That is really messed-up.

Not 100% sure, but I believe that this is a case of changing cultural perceptions. Back at the time, saying that a marriage “probably wouldn’t work” was serious criticism.

Les Fontenelle

May 19, 2013 at 9:09 am

When I was a kid (and read all these stories on reprint anthologies here in Brasil) I was constantly baffled by Superman’s inexplicable infatuation with that loathsome harpy Lois Lane. Superman’s greatest weakness was clearly his horrible taste in women. What a genuinely awful person she was.

So in short, a fairly typical day in the life of Lois Lane.

Les Fontenelle

May 19, 2013 at 1:54 pm

On a positive note, how awesome is Schaffenberger’s work with facial expressions? The characters’s emotions are crystal clear on very panel, an economy of lines always filled with meaning, and no “blank” expressions unless a specific plot point requires it. That’s a rare skill, back then or today. Even the little green alien who gives Superman the story’s Mcguffin has an adorably kind look on his face!

Les Fontenelle

May 19, 2013 at 1:56 pm

Argh, typo on the second line. Curse this site for not having an edit function! (shakes fist)

It’s always pleasantly surprising how many people love Schaffenberger. The kind of lightweight stuff he often drew would make it easy to dismiss him (it happens often enough) so it’s great he’s appreciated.

Yeah, Schaffenberger never seems to be mentioned as one of the great Superman artists, but he’s a top 3 favorite for me, and absolutely the quinessential Lois Lane artist. His work is also served very well by the black & white presentation of the Showcase Presents volumes.

You’re right, Travis Pelkie, and one of these days I’d like to see a romantic comedy-style montage of a bunch of their batshit crazy dates. Something like that would’ve been right at home on the “Batman: Brave and the Bold” animated series.

This is the standard against which all Superman stories will now be judged.

“So, wait, as far as the marriage license bureau clerk is aware Lois is actually in her early teens, while Superman is obviously in his late twenties or early thirties… and he only disapproves of their attempt to get married because it wouldn’t work? That is really messed-up.”

No, he flatly refuses to marry them because she is “obviously” a high-schooler (that is, too young to be married). He just expresses additional disappointment in Superman because she’s clearly too young for him.

I’d like to think that clerk spent the rest of his life thinking “I don’t know why everyone thinks Superman is such a great guy… I had to stop that pervert from marrying a 14-year-old one time.”

Oh, SIlver Age, you never fail to amaze and confound.

Remember kids: drugs cure brain injuries

“And I destroyed that picture I took!” Thus the macguffin suddenly and inexplicably vanishes in a puff of exposition. So violent and complete is its departure that an absolute vacuum is formed where it stood, which rips a section of the wall away as the room implodes. Human architecture is simply not designed to withstand the whims of an editor tying up loose ends in a penultimate panel.

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