Once again, thanks to the Discount Comic Book Service for being such nice chaps.

Amazing Spider-Man #600 by Dan Slott, John Romita Jr, Stan Lee, Marcos Martin, and about 100 other people (Marvel)

I haven't bought a Spider-Man comic, since, I dunno, Ultimate Spidey started. And if we're talking the "in-continuity" stuff, since Mackie and Byrne were dealing in the single digits. Now we're back in the triple digits, and here I am purchasing a Spider-Man comic. Why? Well, I just can't pass up a deal. What we have here is over 100 pages of brand-new material, with no ads, for a cover price of five bucks. And DCBS was selling it at half price. How could I refuse? It's a lovely, thick wad of comics-- this baby took me about an hour to read (I had to stop twice for snack breaks)!

Slott, Romita, et al. have produced the best Spider-Man comic I've read since I was eight years old or so, and they've done so by creating a comic that eight-year-old me would unabashedly love. It also evokes all the feelings of a classic Stan-Lee-and-company Annual from days gone by. Look at what we get for our paltry dollars: A 60+ page main story with fight scenes and guest stars galore, a wedding, classic villains, and a cast of dozens. The spirit of Spidey's 60s heyday still lives, vibrantly bursting forth from every page. And let's face it-- at this point, Spider-Man flows so mightily through John Romita Jr's veins that he doesn't have to draw anymore, only bleed all over the page; when it dries, it looks like this-- which is to say, amazing. Or perhaps spectacular. Or maybe "Web of." Okay, not that last one.

I was truly surprised-- and pleasantly so-- at how good this comic was. It's Spidey as you like him: In college! In trouble! In action! action! action! Okay, maybe not that first one, but everything else. We've got Spidey cracking jokes (I quite appreciated the reference to Family Guy's "everybody gets one" and the someone-else-remembers crack about Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place), we've got the umpteenth Doctor Octopus story (with a twist), we've got J. Jonah Jameson officiating his father's wedding to Aunt May-- it's like Stan-Lee-a-palooza all up in here. Then The Man himself stops by to pen a quick ditty (with Marcos Martin art!) about a Stan Lee stand-in chatting with Spidey about all his freakish transformations and continuity mishaps, until he's driven mad by it all and seeks out a shadowy Steve Ditko for guidance. And then the rest of the Spidey-writing crew stops by for back-up strips, and those go about how you'd expect: Waid and Doran do an obvious but still moving Uncle Ben story; Gale and Alberti deliver a pretty but empty story about how Spidey's life sucks; Guggenheim and the Breitweisers do the same Aunt May story that everybody does every 100 issues or so; Wells and Donovan poke some fun at the Spider-Mobile's expense; and Kelly and Fiumara get to be all portentous and stuff with a Madame Web flash-forward. Throw in some one-page gags and even a letters page (gasp!), and you've got yourself an epic comics package that makes everything 1965 all over again. Or 1976. Or 1987. Or 1994.

Will it get me to follow Spider-Man on a regular basis? Well, no-- but it was nice to stop by and see what some old friends were up to. Eight-year-old Bill(y) gives it his highest recommendation.

Atomic Robo: Shadow from Beyond Time #3 by Brian Clevinger, Scott Wegener, Ronda Pattison, and Jeff Powell (Red 5)

I believe I've figured out why I enjoy Brian Clevinger's writing on this book so much. Oh, you may think it's for the face-rocking action or the hilarious banter-- and well, it is-- but it's also for his unwavering commitment to verisimilitude. Recently, he's spent some time on the Atomic Robo site explaining why giant robots and aliens aren't gonna show up in the Roboverse anytime soon-- because, naturally, a world with giant robots and aliens wouldn't be a world exactly like our own. You may find this a bit hypocritical, considering the comic is about a talking robot that fights giant bugs, Lovecraftian beasts from beyond this dimension, and Nazi war machines, but I enjoy seeing everything fit into an uber-context, rather than a patchwork universe like DC or Marvel, where God is a known quantity, space travel's a piece of piss, and extinction events occur every two weeks without daily life being affected at all. That's why the back-and-forth dialogue between Robo and the supposedly time-traveling super-smart raptor Dr. Dinosaur in the Free Comic Book Day special was so awesome. But that's me.

Anyway, the comic. This issue jumps the story ahead by a few decades, as 1950s Robo reencounters the aforementioned Lovecraftian beast from beyond this dimension in a cross between an Atomic Age B-movie and the Left 4 Dead video game. It's as funny, cool, and exciting as every other issue of Atomic Robo, which just goes to show that this is probably the most consistently enjoyable comic on the stands. And you should buy it.

Also, Scott Wegener's art is as lovely and fluid as your favorite lager. The overlooked team of Pattison and Powell does an excellent job, too; every aspect of this comic is just damn pretty. Now buy the damned thing or I'm going to come to your house, use your bathroom, and leave the toilet seat up.

Batman & Robin #2 by Grant Morrison, Frank Quitely, and let's be honest, you're not reading these credits, are you? (DC)

Can a comic be too good? Is such a thing possible? I'm afraid Morrison and Quitely may have discovered the alchemical formula to such a thing. Seriously, everything in this comic is so perfectly tuned: every word so considered, you can literally taste each line of dialogue; every panel so meticulously laid out, every image so precise, that the pages exist as modern architecture more than drawings on a page. Morrison and Quitely bring out the best in each other, of that there's no doubt, but their collaboration is such a well-oiled machine that the work almost feels rote and mechanical-- lifeless, by being too lively, or somesuch paradox. The rich art and seemingly minimalist scripting techniques that I've enjoyed so completely since I first saw them in concert on New X-Men in 2001 have perhaps oversaturated me; they hold less impact. Perhaps I'm just insane.

Anyway, the comic. It's a fast-paced sucker, this one, with a gorgeously laid-out fight scene taking up the bulk of the plot, though G-Mo and F-Qui crisscross these sequences with trademark after-the-fact Dick Grayson despair, though Alfred, of course, saves the day, as he always does. My biggest problem comes from Alex Sinclair's coloring, actually; the backgrounds shimmer like a pool of oil left floating in a parking lot. I'm not sure if it's a fluke of the printing process or a stylistic choice, but it is slightly off-putting to my eyes, at least. But that's a good thing. If this comic was any better it would probably suck-- going so far up one end of the scale that it appears at the other end, like a mighty Ouroboros.

Captain Britain and MI13 #15 by Paul Cornell, Leonard Kirk, Jay Leisten, Brian Reber, and Joe Caramagna (Marvel)

I have awfully heavy hackles, let me tell you, but several things still manage to raise them. Take the cancellation of this series, for example. I'm used to comics I like being canceled, as it's something that happens to me often. The unfortunate demise of this series could've been prevented, however, if someone in editorial took the unwieldy title-- and the fact that the good Captain is probably the least interesting character in his own book-- and changed it to Avengers U.K., or something similar. Avengers: England, BBC Avengers, The British Avengers, Wait, No, Not the Steed and Peel Ones. Whatever. That's what this comic's all about, after all-- England's Mightiest Heroes, defending queen and country. Those Avengers comics are pretty hot, these days. Maybe a different title and an occasional cameo from a sneering Norman Osborn would've given us another ten thousand readers or so. Who knows? The praise of the blogosphere clearly doesn't seem to have an effect on sales, otherwise the Top Ten would have stuff like Seaguy, Young Liars, Scalped, and this.

Anyway, the comic. This is the grand finale of my favorite Marvel series of the past, oh, 15 or so months. It gives us everything we could expect, in a Joss-Whedon-y "season finale that could totally be a series finale, and oops, it is" way. Tables turned, lost loves reunited, vampire torpedoes from space, a gratuitous Death's Head appearance, swordfights with Dracula, and probably the coolest final page from anything in a while. Paul Cornell writes the hell out of it, Leonard Kirk draws the hell out of it-- it's good comics. It's British comics.

Love 'em and leave 'em-- that's the British way. At least, that's what I've learned from James Bond and short-but-satisfying British television seasons. The nigh-paltry sum of 15 issues and an annual is certainly less than Cornell intended for this series, but I'm glad we got that much, at least.

(I would love Cornell to write a Blade series. He is the only one to ever make me care about Blade.)

Dethklok versus the Goon by Eric Powell and Dave Stewart, with some help from Brendon Small, and hey, they didn't credit a letterer, did they? (Dark Horse)

I've tried Eric Powell's Goon before, and it wasn't to my taste. I initially thought the same thing about Metalocaylpse, however, but giving it a few tries on Adult Swim eventually won me over completely. So when I saw that my favorite fictional animated heavy metal band, Dethklok, was crossing over with the Goon, I knew I had to give it a try. And so I did. And I didn't like it.

This reads like bad Metalocalypse fanfiction, which is weird, because creator Brendon Small was brought in to script doctor. Lines that might work in a late-night cartoon, however, fall completely flat on the page, but most of the dialogue just doesn't ring true as what the Dethklok characters would say, or perhaps how they'd say it. "Flat" and "untrue" describes the art, as well. I love Powell's art-- and when it comes to the Goonverse characters, he's right on. But when he draws the Dethklok gang, he does so in a flatter, less-defined, 2-D style, as best to ape the look of 2-D animation; it all just looks off somehow, contributing to the lifelessness of the whole thing.

I can see why they didn't credit a letter, though-- because the lettering is terrible. Maybe Augie De Blieck and I are the only folks who notice this kinda thing, but the first-- okay, maybe the third-- rule of lettering is (or should be) "don't cross your i's in the middle of a word." Down with the serifs! It makes the whole thing look ugly. The choice of font isn't exactly a winner, either. The writing was probably half-killed purely because of the lettering, which is, of course, antithetical.

So yeah, I'll stick to the cartoons.

Doctor Who: Room with a Déjà View by Rich "Bleeding Cool" Johnston, Eric J, Kris Carter, and Neil Uyetake (IDW)

If all time travel stories give Greg Burgas a headache, this one would probably kill him outright. Our hero, the Doctor, receives a distress call (or does he?) and investigates, landing in a isolated space station in the literal middle of nowhere (or is it?). There's been a murder (or has there?) and the prime suspect happens to be an alien fellow called a Counter, who lives his life backwards in time (or does h-- yes, yes he does), answering the Doctor's questions before he asks them. So, naturally, to unravel the mystery, the Doctor travels back in time-- over and over and over again-- to work out the chap's story. Because of this, a few sequences in the comic have to be read backwards to get the full poop, a clever little trick we'd probably never see on the TV show.

Rich Johnston nails the tenth Doctor's voice down pretty well, as the script sparkles with jokes, asides, and one-liners, but the emotional moments sell the whole story. The backwards interrogation scene is the central showcase, and the main conceit of the plot plays those clever tricks with time travel that we all like seeing. Eric J's art is often rough-hewn, but tells the story well enough; the script's clearly the star here, though.

I've praised a lot of comics to the hilt in this post, batting my eyes at them until they buy me one drink too many and whisk me off to their respective hotel rooms, but I have to say that this little book here is my comic of the month. I wouldn't mind seeing Rich get another crack at the Whoniverse. This is a really great little one-shot, doing the exact kind of thing these comic spin-offs should do: telling a good story in a manner the televised parent can't get away with.

Greek Street #1 by Peter Milligan, Davide Gianfelice, Patricia Mulvihill, and Clem Robins (DC/Vertigo)

I give every new Peter Milligan comic a chance, because Milligan's delivered a lot of my favorite comics over the years. This is not one of them. The premise, which adapts classic Greek tragedies to a dark, edgier, modern HBO setting is okay enough, sure, but the execution leaves me cold, and I liked Davide Gianfelice's artwork more in the first arc of Northlanders. It's worth picking up if you see it lying around, because it's one measly dollar for an oversized first issue, meaning everyone should give it a try, as it's bound to be the perfect comic for somebody. I'm not that guy, though.

My biggest gripe with this issue comes from the coloring, however. I guess it adheres to the standard Vertigo color palette, but it looks more like Patricia Mulvihill never met a shade of brown she didn't like. Browns, mauves, anything generally dark that bleeds well together with other tepid tones, making the art look more muddled than anything else. I picked up the second trade of Scalped, from the same colorist, and I could barely tell what was happening on some of the pages. Nothing really stands out; the characters on every page look like action figures sinking into mud. I don't know if it's the fault of the colors, or the paper stock, or both, but this is probably the drabbest comic you will see this summer.

Ignition City #4 by Warren Ellis, Gianluca Pagliarani, Chris Dreier, Digikore Studios, and why don't these comics credit letterers, darn it? (Avatar)

Ever notice the indicia in Avatar's books? "All characters as depicted in these stories are over the age of 18"? I'm sure that's left over from Avatar's, er, less savory publishing days, but since they've become the go-to place for original work from Ellis, Ennis, and even Moore, among others, it seems like something they could do away with, no?

Anyway, the comic. Ellis brings the goods here, giving us my favorite issue of the series thus far. The reason? It's almost all down to Doc Vukovic; every line he spews is absolute gold, from the bit you see above to "Science will fuck you!" and "They are stupider than mud that's been fucked by a donkey." What Vukovic really brings to the proceedings, though, is heart. Our protagonist Mary Raven is finally able to let her guard down, allowing Ellis to reveal the emotional core of the characters. The series works in detailing a place where all the glorious, forward-looking, optimistic pulp science fiction of old has a cynical shadow fall over it. The Buck Rogers analogue reveals the horror of the future that turned him into a broken man; a thug, spending all his time in the engine rooms of those old shiny ships, laments never having seen space; the old Doc has stopped wondering, stopped being curious, and it's ruined him. Cracks begin to show in the dark veneer, however, as Ellis lets a bit of hope and redemption leak through; the mad bastard is, of course, a big softie.

Gianluca Pagliarani's artwork looks less like lines on paper and more like woodcuts, or perhaps etchings on the side of a big metal spaceship that's starting to rust over. It's a fitting aesthetic for this book.

Lightning Round!

Beta Ray Bill: Godhunter #2 by Kieron Gillen, Kano, Álvaro Lopez, Javier Rodriguez, and Nate Piekos (Marvel)

This book's likely to fly under the radar of most "mainstream" readers, I'd imagine, except for the completists (get all those space horse comics!), and that small sect of comics aficionados who enjoy "quality." And yet, this probably sells five times or more than Gillen's baby, Phonogram.

Anyway, the comic. It's cleverly written, with some fine character work for comics' favorite Bill, and well drawn by Kano. And it still has that snazzy Simonson reprint in the back, complete with eye-singing primary coloring.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer #26 by Jane Espenson, Georges Jeanty, Andy Owens, Michelle Madsen, and Jimmy Betancourt (Dark Horse)

Joss Whedon has a strong pimp hand. This is why I'm still buying this series, which had, at one point, some forward plot momentum, but which took a year off to wander around and "find itself," like a pretentious teenager. And now Jane Espenson is kick-starting the plot again and throwing the whole cast in a room together because bloody hell, it's #26 and we haven't really done anything! When season nine-- which I'll probably buy, because pimp hand--  inevitably hits, I hope the cast shrinks considerably. We just can't care about faceless hordes of teen slayers getting impaled by faceless hordes of demons. The cast needs some serious trimming, and the thematic focus needs to go back to what it once was-- high school/college/growing up is hell. Not "my army is bigger than your army."

Anyway, the comic. Oz is back. Yay, Oz! Now can we get more racist Dracula?

Doctor Who #1 by Tony Lee, Al Davison, Lovern Kindzierski, and Robbie Robbins (IDW)

Here's the debut of the new Tony-Lee-driven ongoing Doctor Who series, and the last place we're going to be seeing the Tenth Doctor once David Tennant's final stories air at the end of this year. But even when Matt Smith graces our screen, we can still turn to IDW for more Doc Ten goodness. This issue's got the atmosphere of a 1970s episode with the gob of the Tenth Doctor, as he stumbles into old-timey Hollywood and runs into Charlie Chaplin-- oh, I'm sorry, Archie Maplin. That's the biggest problem with the issue-- the fact that something legal popped up at the last minute and turned Chaplin into Maplin. But that's what white-out is for. Meanwhile, Davison's art is solid, with some good facial work in spots, but the occasional awkward figure here or there. This crew seems to really "get it," and this series will sate Who fans' hunger as they wait for the next special to air.

I have no idea how Burgas does this reviewing thing every week. It took me two weeks just to write this.

16 Comments

• At August 13, 2009, Red 5 Comics » Blog Archive » Reviews for Red 5 Titles wrote:

  [...] Comic Book Resources It’s as funny, cool, and exciting as every other issue of Atomic Robo, which just goes ...

• At August 13, 2009, Joe wrote:

  The only problem with calling Captain Britain & MI13 would be that the internet would be complaining about "yet another ...

• At August 13, 2009, Matt wrote:

  Buffy Season 8, I want to love you, but you're taking waaaaay too long to do anything. We should already ...

• At August 13, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  Isn't Chris Dreier the letterer on Ignition City?

• At August 13, 2009, Michael P. wrote:

  You said it was funny, so I sincerely hope that Spidey 600 had more than just tired pop culture jokes. ...

• At August 13, 2009, FunkyGreenJerusalem wrote:

  I got all excited thinking you had #3 of Batman And Robin to review... where is that thing?

  Also, it weirds ...

• At August 13, 2009, onion3000 wrote:

  'Captain Britain & MI13' should have been called "The Blighty Avengers."

• At August 13, 2009, Alan Coil wrote:

  "‘Captain Britain & MI13? should have been called..." the Cancelled Avengers. Buh-Bye.

• At August 13, 2009, Mary Warner wrote:

  I'm glad you finally read a Spider-Man issue again. the fact is, despite all the complaints from the professional ...

• At August 13, 2009, FunkyGreenJerusalem wrote:

  .) But it seems half the guys on the internet refuse to even look at the book anymore, so they ...

• At August 13, 2009, Bill Reed wrote:

  (Two Guys, A Girl, & A Pizza Place? Yeah, that’s on-topic!)

  It is an outdated reference, but I loved that sitcom. ...

• At August 13, 2009, Bill Reed wrote:

  Spider-Man is finally being done right again, even if they had to really screw things up to get it there. ...

• At August 14, 2009, Kieron Gillen wrote:

  Thanks, Bill. And, yes, it does.

  KG

• At August 14, 2009, Chad Nevett wrote:

  Greg -- Avatar books don't credit the letterer, so who it is is unknown... unless you just ask them.

• At August 14, 2009, Mary Warner wrote:

  For some reason, even though I clearly recognised the psychiatrist as Stan immediately, it never occured to me that the ...

• At August 15, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  Chad: Yeah, I saw that Dreier was the inker after I posted. I always assumed the artist lettered the ...

Not as laugh-out-loud funny as usual, but with some quality humorous lines ("New plan. Drive away forever."). However, it's still ridiculously entertaining, surprisingly touching, and Wegener, not surprisingly, draws the crap out of it. I hope you're getting the trade if you're not getting the single issues.

Battlefields: The Tankies #3 (of 3) by Garth Ennis (writer), Carlos Ezquerra (penciller), Hector Ezquerra (inker), Tony Aviña (colorist), and Simon Bowland (letterer). $3.50, 22 pgs, FC, Dynamite Entertainment.

I guess there's not much to say about this. I like Ennis's war comics, so I like this. It's not as good as "Dear Billy," but that's okay. It does have a nice moment with a German talking to the Brits - Ennis does these kinds of things, with soldiers on different sides meeting and understanding the horror the war, very well - and it looks nice. It will be keen to see the new series next year.

Captain Britain and MI 13 #15 ("Vampire State: Conclusion") by Paul Cornell (writer), Leonard Kirk (penciler), Jay Leisten (inker), Brian Reber (colorist), and Joe Caramagna (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, Marvel.

Well, thank God that's over. Now you can all be happy buying yet another shitty Avengers or X-Men comic and not feel guilty about skipping this. Let's hope Marvel never tries this shit again, because we all know well-written, well-drawn comics full of awesome moments, excellent characterization, brilliant plots and plot twists, and appearances by freakin' Death's Head can't sell at all as they don't star Wolverine. Now, if everyone can just stop buying Agents of Atlas, that would be super.

Fuck.

(Oh, I don't mean you guys, who are generally pretty discerning about what you buy - even if you weren't buying Captain Britain, you're buying something like Kramer's Ergot to make up for it. Let's just blame ... those mouthbreathers at the Jinxworld forums, okay? That'll work!)

Detective Comics #855 ("Elegy Part 2: Misterioso"/"Pipeline Chapter One Part Two") by Greg Rucka (writer), J. H. Williams III (artist, "Elegy"), Dave Stewart (colorist, "Elegy"), Todd Klein (letterer, "Elegy"), Cully Hamner (artist, "Pipeline"), Laura Martin (colorist, "Pipeline"), and Jared K. Fletcher (letterer, "Pipeline"). $3.99, 30 pgs, FC, DC.

I like how Williams manages to work what happens in the comic into the work of art of the cover. In a world where we get far too many freakin' superhero pose covers, that's pretty nice.

As with the last issue, the art is the reason to buy this book, as Williams does his usual unbelievable job. I don't really have anything to say about his layouts and panels and the way he shifts styles throughout the book - Jog has probably already written all you need to know about the art, because he's smarter than I am. But it's a shame that Rucka isn't stepping up his game a bit more - I read a tiny and short preview of Stumptown at San Diego, and in about five pages, Rucka was better than he's been on two whole issues of this story. It's not that either story is bad, it's just that, like much of DC and Marvel's output these days, it's bland. Williams (and even Hamner) cover up most of the flaws, but it's still kind of dull. Batwoman even comments how ridiculous it is to have a second villain in Gotham City who takes their schtick from Alice in Wonderland. So Rucka is even aware how ridiculous "Alice" is. Frankly, the idea of Alice in Wonderland as creeped-out drug trip has been done so much in comics that it's a horrible cliché, so "Alice" is more idiotic than anything. I mean, I guess it wouldn't be as "iconic," but wouldn't it be cool if a Bat-villain modeled themselves after ... Kurtz in Heart of Darkness? Or Heathcliff in Wuthering Heights (man, that guy is a tool)? Or the first Mrs. Rochester? Or Titus Andronicus from the Shakespeare play (man, that dude was nuts)? Or Warren Harding, the avatar of all that's evil in American history? Come on, comic book writers, get creative!!!! Going straight to Lewis Carroll betrays a lack of imagination, if you ask me.

Anyway, you know how, at least 213 times a year, Batman has to reminisce about his parents getting killed?* Well, apparently we can't have a Batwoman comic without our latest alternative-lifestyled heroine reminiscing about her origins either! Yay - she has some trauma in her past! That's why I always liked Tim Drake before DC decided to start, you know, slaughtering his family - he just wanted to be Batman because he thought it was the right thing to do, not because he had some childhood trauma. Couldn't our Indigo Girls-listening heroine been inspired by Bats to do the right thing? I guess not, and so we must cue the traumatic event from her childhood.

But at least someone gets shot in the head! Good times. Man, I can't wait for Stumptown to come out.

I will say that the final panel really looks silly, art-wise. Williams isn't perfect, apparently. It's so poorly-drawn that it looks goofy, and given the context, it's not supposed to look goofy. It's still better than the writing, so there's that.

* It's part of Bob Kane's diabolical contract with DC! Look it up!

Elephantmen War Toys: Yvette ("Nightingale") by Richard Starkings (writer), Moritat (artist), and Wright (colorist - Jason, probably, but it could be Gregory). $3.50, 29 pgs, FC, Image.

Starkings returns to Yvette, his protagonist from last year's War Toys mini-series (which was brilliant, by the way) and shows what happened in between the panels in a crucial moment from that series. We get to see Yvette and how she began to change from a typical resistance fighter to someone who could actually hunt and kill elephantmen. This is a brutally harsh story, one that fits well into the mini-series, and Starkings does his usual excellent job giving us a character who is pushed to the brink and tries desperately to hold onto her humanity. It's fascinating comparing Yvette's transformation to the struggle of the liberated elephantmen to become more human in the "present" of the book. Just as Yvette needs to find her inner animal, so to speak, so Hip and his cronies need to find their inner human. It's tragic watching Yvette become something else even as we realize that this will make her a more efficient enemy of the hybrids and perhaps allow her to help her fellow humans. We always feel for this kind of character in fiction, an outsider who does what needs to be done in order to help her fellows but loses something in the process, and Yvette is no exception. That Starkings does it so well in such a short time speaks, again, to his ability with these characters. Moritat's art is staggering, and I should have asked him if he's doing anything different with it. When he was the regular penciller on the book (and he's going to be back soon, apparently), his lines were much crisper, which befitted the feel of a futuristic epic. His black-and-white work on War Toys was much rougher, however, and in this issue, which is colored, is also rougher. It feels like a war story, with Yvette trying to overcome the terror she feels as she desperately kills her enemies. It's magnificent art, and it's interesting to see the shift in style from Moritat.

As usual, I struggle to find new ways to praise this comic. But it's richly deserved. And this is a one-shot (even though it ties into the mini-series), so you can get a good feel for the comic from just this one issue!

Gemini #4 (of 5) by Jay Faerber (writer), Jon Sommariva (artist/colorist), Fares Maese (colorist), E. Bola (colorist), Fco Plascencia (colorist), and Rus Wooton (letterer). $3.50, 26 pgs, FC, Image.

Boy, it's been a while, hasn't it? I'm not sure I should even review this, because it's been so long that those who were buying it may have given up and decided to wait for the trade. I certainly can't fault them for that. It's a pretty good issue, though, as Gemini fights Dynamo 5 and Faerber, like he's been doing for most of this decade, twists the superhero cliché of two heroes fighting just enough to make it interesting - in this case, the kids from Dynamo 5 don't know who Gemini is, but they quickly begin to figure it out because they listen to him and his former handler instead of just mindlessly fighting. Wow, imagine that!

I guess the final issue is on track for release, so that's cool. Of course, you're probably waiting for the trade, right?

Hellblazer #257 ("Hooked Part Two of Three: Temptation") by Peter Milligan (writer), Giuseppe Camuncoli (layouter), Stefano Landini (finisher), Jamie Grant (colorist), and Sal Cipriano (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, DC/Vertigo.

Dang, I love Phoebe. Milligan better not fuck with her!

Ignition City #4 (of 5) by Warren Ellis (writer), Gianluca Pagliarani (illustrater), Chris Dreier (inker), and Digikore Studios (colorist). $3.99, 22 pgs, FC, Avatar.

I'm really enjoying this series, as Ellis is really doing a nice job balancing the wackiness of pulp science with the mystery of what happened to Mary's dad. Pagliarani shines in this issue, too, as Mary finishes her gunfight with the bad guys and we get more glimpses of the future, which is typically horrible. As this is the penultimate issue, Ellis gives us some answers, although he cheats and deliberately withholds the big secret - boo, Ellis! That's okay, because Ellis has fun with Dr. Vukovic. Mary tells him his house smells weird, and he says "It smells of SCIENCE!" Then he calls the men who destroy his stuff "stupider than mud that's been fucked by a donkey." I'm not sure why getting fucked by a donkey makes mud stupider, but what the hell, right?

I suppose I'll have to wait until the final issue comes out to see if Ellis pulls this whole thing off, but right now, it's really going well. I just wish Ellis would make scads of money off of this so we didn't get yet another Iron Man mini-series from him. Oh well.

The Incredible Hercules #131 ("The Harrowing") by Greg Pak (writer), Fred van Lente (writer), Ryan Stegman (penciler), Terry Pallot (inker), Raúl Treviño (colorist), Chris Sotomayor (colorist), and Simon Bowland (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, Marvel.

Reasons why Simon Bowland should win an Eisner for lettering based solely on this issue:

1. When "mortal" Hercules hits "immortal" Hercules in the mouth, the sound effect is "jawcrack."
2. When "our" Hercules kicks "their" Hercules in the gut, the sound effect is "crackajammatu."
3. When "their" Hercules flies through a strangely familiar hellish landscape, the sound effect is "bosch."
4. When "mortal" Hercules kicks back, the sound effect is "ardhisdoree."
5. When "immortal" Hercules flies through the air into a boulder pushed by a certain Greek king and smashes it, the sound effect is "powdah."
6. When said Greek king celebrates because his ordeal is over but then another boulder magically reappears, the sound effect is "sisy-poof."
7. When "our" Hercules backhands "their" Hercules, the sound effect is "bichslapp."
8. When "mortal" Hercules rips away a flaming wheel from some dude, the sound effect is "ixion."
9. When "our" Hercules busts up the wheel, the sound effect is "splintuh."

I get joy out of such strange things, don't I? Seriously - give that man an Eisner!

The Life and Times of Savior 28 #4 ("Enemy Combatants") by J. M. DeMatteis (writer), Mike Cavallaro (artist), Andrew Covalt (colorist), and Neil Uyetake (letterer). $3.99, 22 pgs, FC, IDW.

You want a review? You got one!

The Lone Ranger #17 ("Resolve") by Brett Matthews (writer), Sergio Cariello (artist), Marcelo Pinto (colorist), and Simon Bowland (letterer). $3.50, 22 pgs, FC, Dynamite Entertainment.

I'm glad that Dynamite decided to stop releasing this book until an arc was done, because the delays between issues was really annoying, even though I'm much more willing to cut books like this some slack. I just hope they're right and that we'll get a few consecutive months with this title, which continues to be a very entertaining book. Matthews tells straightforward stories, Cariello illustrates them very well, and you can almost hear the theme music as you read. Even the brutal parts of the book - Cavendish is still hanging around, and doing horrible things - are not as awful and graphic as you might find in any random superhero comic these days, but they still have an impact. It's refreshing to read a comic where the heroes do heroic things, the villain does evil things, and the woman isn't simply waiting around for the hero to come home. Take a break from heroes tap-dancing on villains' brains and check this out!

Madame Xanadu #13 ("Exodus Noir Part Three: Ware Not the Dead") by Matt Wagner (writer), Michael Wm. Kaluta (artist), Dave Stewart (colorist), and Jared K. Fletcher (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, DC/Vertigo.

After reading the trade of the first ten issues (13 bucks for 10 issues - why would I buy single issues?) and the first three issues of this arc, I'm not sure if I'm ready to start buying this series once Kaluta leaves, but this is shaping up to be a fairly nice story. Wagner is giving us a nice pulp mystery with weird Moroccans and demon dogs and guest appearances by Wesley Dodds (Wagner, remember, wrote most of his adventures back when he had his own series) and terrible magic, plus the flashback to 1493, where Ms. Xanadu is still getting it on with a hot young redhead and the Inquisition is starting to think there's something fishy about two hot women sharing a room. I mean, what could be weird about that?

It's a sumptuously drawn book, to be sure, and the story fits Kaluta's skills in a way that it might not Amy Reeder Hadley's, so it's a nice shift in the storytelling of Wagner. I'm still reserving judgment on it, obviously, until it's finished, but so far it's pretty good.

Northlanders #19 ("The Shield Maidens Part 2 of 2") by Brian Wood (writer), Danijel Zezelj (artist), Dave McCaig (colorist), and Travis Lanham (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, DC/Vertigo.

Wood, as he always does with these arcs, starts off with violence and uses it to examine other aspects of society and culture, in a way that's kind of sneaky but much appreciated. Like the two-issue story about Lindisfarne, this story has an element of the pagan culture of the Norse clashing with the Christian culture of the Saxons, but it also gives us a glimpse into the way women were viewed in this era. It's interesting that Grettr, one of the Viking women, is familiar enough with Christianity that she can make value judgments about it (whether she's right or not is inconsequential - ninth-century Christian culture was far more complex than she thinks, or indeed could be discussed in a 22-page comic book, but that's neither here nor there, really), as it implies that the Norse women, at least, were more involved in their world than we might expect. We've seen this throughout the series, and Wood makes it explicit in this story. It's also interesting that later, Grettr narrates that they are spinsters, and "well-regarded," implying that Norse women weren't quite as "independent" as they'd like to think - what if they had been younger and still marriageable? Would they have been able to live independently? Quite a few Christian widows were able to live as Grettr, Lif, and Thyra could. What's nice about this series is that Wood, for all his seemingly black-and-white pronouncements, is usually much more subtle when it comes right down to it. History is far more subtle than we like to think, and Wood gives us both the big, bloody battles and the more interesting societal forces working upon these characters.

Of course, that doesn't mean we don't get lots of people getting killed, and Zezelj does a magnificent job with that, along with McCaig, who changes colors to highlight the battle. The full page of the ocean across which the ladies must swim is beautiful, evoking the fear that even those accustomed to the water have of it.

As always, this book is very good if you don't know the history, but knowing it makes things a bit more ironic. At one point, Thyra tells a priest, "We own nearly this whole island ... only your sickly king in Wessex remains." The king at this time was Æthelred, and while he was a lousy king, his death in 871 paved the way for his brother Alfred, the only English monarch called "the Great," who was quite good at beating the Danes later in his career. I know people like Bill Reed don't care about this, but I think it's neat.

Phonogram: The Singles Club #4 (of 7) ("Konichiwa Bitches"/"Roses"/"Theory and Practice") by Kieron Gillen (writer), Jamie McKelvie (artist/letterer), and Matthew Wilson (colorist). "Roses" by Kieron Gillen (writer), David LaFuente (artist), and Christina Strain (colorist); "Theory and Practice" by Kieron Gillen (writer) and Charity Larrison (artist). $3.50, 27 pgs, FC, Image.

If I were to tell you that this entire comic book (well, the main story) features a six-panel grid with the same two people in said panels for 13 of its 16 pages, you'd be forgiven for thinking it's boring. If I tell you it's not, you'd be forgiven for thinking that Alan Moore wrote it and it's all about the power of sex magic, and it's not possible that the art could be any good. Well, my friends, in my increasingly futile attempts to remain objective about Phonogram, I can tell you this is not only written brilliantly, but drawn wonderfully as well. Gillen gives us Seth Bingo and Silent Girl (who talks quite a bit in this issue) DJing at the club where the book occurs, and the dialogue is astonishing. It's simply Seth griping about the musical tastes of everyone in the room and Silent Girl undermining him, and it builds to a double-page spread that summarizes pretty much what this mini-series is about. As the middle issue of the series, it provides the fulcrum of Gillen's theme, and he gets there so naturally that we excuse and even embrace the bombastic and wee bit pretentious idea that he's toying with. And if you think McKelvie can't draw the same two people standing at a turntable set for almost the entire issue, well, you've never read a McKelvie comic before. Just looking at the way Seth and Silent Girl interact in this book is wonderful, and you can do it without the dialogue and know exactly what each is feeling. The two pages where Silent Girl breaks out Blondie's "Atomic" are masterful - Seth is determined to pump the party up, and his face is set to do just that. When Silent Girl gets the disc out, we get the holy light of Blondie bathing the two (literally) and Seth must look away while Silent Girl, who's wearing protective goggles (seriously), gazes in wonder upon the glory of the disc. When the track starts playing, they both affect disinterest until the music starts, and then they sing along, building to a glorious shout of "Atomic!" It's this kind of attention to detail that makes both the writing and art on Phonogram such a joy to look at. McKelvie does this throughout, and as usual, I'm not sure how these two gentlemen manage to create such brilliant stories in 16 short pages, but I'm certainly glad they do.

Power Girl #3 ("Gorilla Warfare") by Justin Gray (writer), Jimmy Palmiotti (writer), Amanda Conner (artist), Paul Mounts (colorist), and John J. Hill (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, DC.

As I mentioned, I'm going to buy the next two issues based on Palmiotti's recommendation (and the final pages that set up the next issue look pretty keen), but I wish the first three had been better. This issue is somewhat anticlimactic, and when your star is reduced to a supporting role in her own book, that's not good. I guess DC editorial wanted the JSA in this to tie it to that book a bit, but let's hope PG gets to go solo next issue. And it would be nice if the bad guys, who have been fighting female heroes for decades, wouldn't fall back on the "fragile and weak-minded female" cliché. As we saw in this arc, Ultra-Humanite was allied with a strong and totally evil woman, so even if he doesn't respect women, would he really think they're fragile and weak-minded? I don't know why that bugged me, but it did. Oh well. You know who's awesome? Amanda Conner, that's who. But you already knew that.

Rapture #3 (of 6) by Taki Soma (storier/layouter), Michael Avon Oeming (artist), Val Staples (colorist), and Thomas Mauer (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, Dark Horse.

You know who else is awesome? Val Staples. Okay, discerning readers have probably already figured that out, but he doesn't get to cut loose all that much on the Brubillips books (Criminal and Incognito), so it's occasionally hard to see why he's so good. But here, he turns Soma and Oeming's odd post-apocalyptic superhero/horror epic (Geoff Johns should read this to see superhero horror done right) into a truly bizzare and almost surreal comic, with too-bright colors on some pages, too many magentas and blues on others, almost sickening reds on some pages - none of it should work, really, but Staples chooses just the right hues to make this a horrifying yet richly textured superhero comic that nevertheless unsettles us. Soma and Oeming do some gore, sure (not as much as a certain space cop/zombie story), but when they do, it's fairly shocking, and Staples's bright red blood against the red brick makes the whole scene even more disturbing than the buckets of black blood being spilled elsewhere. I'm sorry to keep bringing up that comic, but Soma and Oeming do a very good job showing the gore judiciously, and Staples's coloring makes it feel worse than William Hand shooting himself in the head, even if that was more graphic. This is an odd yet very effective comic, and part of it is due to Staples. Celebrate the colorist!

Secret Warriors #6 by Brian Michael Bendis (storier), Jonathan Hickman (storier/scripter), Stefano Caselli (artist), Daniele Rudoni (colorist), and Dave Lanphear (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, Marvel.

So I'm reading this, trying to decide if I want to keep buying it or not, because the superpowered people just aren't that interesting so far, and most of this issue is those same superpowered people beating up other superpowered people and who cares about that, really? but then Nick Fury turns to Dum Dum Dugan and tells him he has one month until they get serious and Dugan responds, "You give me a month and I'll deliver to you the baddest bunch of evil bastards this world has ever seen. I'll give you Howling Commandos ready to bark at the moon and bite at the sun. Nick, you give me a month and I'll raise a damn army" and I had to stop myself from saying aloud, "HELL FUCKING YEAH!!!!!" So yeah, as long as Hickman does that and maybe, just maybe, kills off all the superpowered people in the next few issues, I'll be on board. Sheesh, I may even start buying Fantastic Four based on that page.

Unknown Soldier #10 ("Easy Kill Chapter Three") by Joshua Dysart (writer), Alberto Ponticelli (artist), Oscar Celestini (colorist), and Clem Robins (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, DC/Vertigo.

Once again, Dysart manages to get some socio-political commentary into his book, which is nice to see as he's not being so terribly overt about it like he was early on. Moses's rant comes from the character and what he's been through, and it's a shocking moment because we thought Dysart was going one way with the story, and now suddenly it's back to where it started, which means trouble. Because the politics comes from Moses's guilt (which it does, as he does something horrible early in the book for which he can't atone), it's more forceful. It also comes from his "programming," for lack of a better word, and is a violent manifestation of something he discusses calmly with his wife earlier in the book (in a dream sequence, that is). So it works very well within the book.

I don't know if this book is doing well or not, but I hope it is, because every issue is getting better, and that's always good to see. I'm curious to see where Dysart is going with this.

And I can't help it, but Moses's dream of himself at the opera (which is different from the one where he talks with his wife) didn't work as well because when I saw the red bull, I thought of this movie, which we own on DVD and which my younger daughter likes quite a bit. So I chuckled at a point in the book where I probably shouldn't have. But that's really my problem, isn't it?

Wasteland #25 ("Planet Caravan") by Antony Johnston (writer), Christopher Mitten (artist/painter), and Douglas E. Sherwood (letterer). $5.99, 44 pgs, FC, Oni Press.

When the Big Two claim something is "double-sized," they tend to lie, as we've often seen. However, this comic is 44 pages of solid story! Stick that in your pipe and smoke it, Joey Q and Danny D!

If you've never read an issue of Wasteland, despite this being six dollars, it's not a bad place to start. Johnston steps back from the regular story to give us a tale from a decade earlier, in which one of our main characters (Michael) has dealings with one of our minor characters (Sultan Ameer). It's a story that shows why the two men don't really like each other, and it gives us a very nice background of the world Johnston has built. And you don't have to know all the various people and the way they relate to each other, as they don't appear.

Mitten's art, however, is why this book is so stunning. The book has always been in black and white, and while that works well for the post-apocalyptic landscape in which the book takes place, the painted colors in this book are amazing. Mitten does a magnificent job using various shades of tan, which sounds boring but really gives the book a "desert" look (believe me, if you move to the desert, you'll be amazed at how many different shades of tan there are) and also makes the brighter colors (when they occur) pop wonderfully. When night falls in the desert, Mitten gives us gorgeous yet slightly creepy purples and blues, so that the landscape itself looks bruised. It's a harsh world these characters inhabit, and while Mitten usually shows this through the starkness of the landscape, in this book he's able to do it through the coloring. And there are a couple of double-paged spreads that are brilliant. Johnston's story is solid (as usual), but Mitten's art is staggering.

Johnston told me the book is back on track, which is nice. I don't mind waiting for issues that deliver, as this does, but I like the book so much that I really want to read the next issue. Man, I don't know how some people wait for the trade on some comics.

We Kill Monsters #1 (of 6) by Christopher Leone (writer), Laura Harkcom (storier), Brian Churilla (penciller/inker), Hilary Barta (inker), Ronda Pattison (colorist), and Jeff Powell (letterer). $3.50, 32 pgs, FC, Red 5 Comics.

The folk at the Red 5 booth gave this to me for free at San Diego, so I figured the swell thing to do is review it, right? I wasn't going to order it based on the preview I read, because it seemed okay but nothing great. If I read good things about it, I could always get the trade, right?

Well, I'm still of that opinion. I actually like it more than I thought it would, because Leone does a nice job establishing the characters of Jake and Drew, two mechanic brothers who accidentally get caught up in monster-killing. While we think Drew is a bit of an idiot for choosing his brother over a girl, Leone does a nice job showing why he does so. Churilla does a good job with the action, which takes up quite a lot of the issue. Drew and Jake get attacked by a monster, kill it, and then get chased by another when they drag the corpse of the first one home. Along the way Jake gets injured, but some strange monster brain juice heals him - well, it then turns his arm into a monster arm, so maybe "heal" isn't the right word. Of course, they soon discover that one of the monsters was pregnant, so there will be more of them!

It's a pretty good first issue, establishing the characters, giving them a reason to do the things they do, and setting up the rest of the series. Leone keeps the monsters' origin a secret, of course, because Drew and Jake don't have time to figure that out right now. Churilla has a good solid line, and his style helps create a "real"-looking world that helps us accept the presence of a big three-eyed monster or two. I'm still pretty sure I'm going to wait for the trade, unless I happen to see the second issue and like what I see, but this is a solid debut.

Wednesday Comics #3-4 (of 12) by many. $3.99, 15 pgs, FC, DC.

Let's review these all using one, count it, ONE word for each story, okay?

Batman (Azzarello, Risso, Robins, Mulvihill): Skeevy!¹

Kamandi (Gibbons, Sook): Valiant!

Superman (Arcudi, Bermejo, Ciardo, Lopez): Emo-tastic!

Deadman (Bullock, Heuck, Stewart): Awesome!

Green Lantern (Busiek, Quinones, Brosseau): Kennedy-esque!

Metamorpho (Gaiman, Allred, Allred, Piekos): Mysterious!

Teen Titans (Berganza, Galloway, Napolitano): Vexing!

Strange Adventures (Pope, Villarrubia): Pulptacular!

Supergirl (Palmiotti, Conner, Mounts, Hill): Goofy!

Metal Men (DiDio, Garcia-Lopez, Nowlan, Lopez, Mulvihill): Good?²

Wonder Woman (Caldwell): Skippable!

Sgt. Rock and Easy Co. (Kubert, Kubert): Decompressed!

Flash Comics (Kerschl, Fletcher, Leigh, McCaig): Headache-inducing!³

The Demon and Catwoman (Simonson, Steelfreeze, Wands): Rhymeless!

Hawkman (Baker): Aqua-diss!

¹ Because of Bruce coming onto the widow, don't you know. Ewwwww.
² I'm not questioning that it's good, I'm questioning that I don't know how a Didio-written story is good.
³ Because of the time travel. Dang, I hate time travel stories.

As this is two weeks' worth of books, let's get two totally random lyrics!

1.
"You say your protection
Is proof of your affection
If I need security
I'll keep a gun on me
Don't barter with me
Don't barter with me

Little sacrifices
Go straight to heaven
But hunting season's over
This is the twentieth century
Don't barter with me"

2.
"Let's go outside to a dark place
Where the kitty cat hides
Put on your fake wings
Give the moon a ride
When you're lonely for the angel inside

Three-thirty in the morning is too easy for you
But when it comes without a warning
What are you gonna do this time?"

The only clue I will give you is that, in accordance with Seth Bingo's rules, "female vocalists only." Although I doubt if he'd approve of the selection.

Man, it's good to be back. Now I just have to read a ton of comics!

32 Comments

• At July 30, 2009, Bill Reed wrote:

  You know, lots of people think that Warren G. Harding was the worst president, but everybody forgets that Grover Cleveland ...

• At July 30, 2009, Bill Reed wrote:

  And I do know who Aethelred and Alfred are! I took a Medieval Lit class. I did not enjoy it, ...

• At July 30, 2009, Bill Reed wrote:

  And I love time travel stories, and am never confused by them. Wibbly wobbly, timey wimey. Suck it, Burgas!

• At July 30, 2009, Brad Curran wrote:

  I like that you're trying to give colorists love. Also, I'm thinking we should start a petition to get Bowland ...

• At July 30, 2009, Brad Curran wrote:

  "Wake me up when they do a Neil Diamond issue."

  I think the Earth ending will do that for you, but ...

• At July 30, 2009, Brad Curran wrote:

  Okay, I really need to write a movie script about Grover Cleave-land, the only President to serve non-consecutive terms and ...

• At July 30, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  You guys are weird.

  That's okay about Phonogram, Bill, we know you're soulless anyway!

  Man, a lot of presidents were evil. ...

• At July 30, 2009, Brad Curran wrote:

  "You guys are weird."

  When Grover Cleave-land becomes a franchise, you will choke on those words. Well, about me. Bill's pretty ...

• At July 30, 2009, Bill Reed wrote:

  I actually like Britpop, by which I mean Pulp is one of my favorite bands. Are they Britpop? I know ...

• At July 30, 2009, Bill Reed wrote:

  Anyway, I figure that dude just writes in whatever sound effects the writers tell him too, you know? And don't ...

• At July 30, 2009, Joe wrote:

  (Oh, I don’t mean you guys, who are generally pretty discerning about what you buy – even if you weren’t ...

• At July 30, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  Hey, if you buy them both, Joe, more power to you!

• At July 30, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  Bill: Well, I hope whoever did those sound effects gets a special Eisner for Awesomeness.

  And I love Neil Diamond. ...

• At July 30, 2009, Michael P. wrote:

  The Demon may not be rhyming, but he *is* speaking in blank verse. And I'd include a wiki link to ...

• At July 31, 2009, Chris McAree wrote:

  I felt like a fanboy when DH showed up in Captain Britain. One small caveat is I always preferred the ...

• At July 31, 2009, The Dude wrote:

  I've bought every issue of Phonogram so far purely because of the art. It's just beautiful stuff but I can't ...

• At July 31, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  Michael: He's speaking in iambic pentameter, isn't he? At least some of the time.

  Dude: The funny thing is, I ...

• At July 31, 2009, The Dude wrote:

  I thought that too when Gillen talked about The Smiths last issue as a "seminal band". God, I hate them ...

• At July 31, 2009, Brian Wood wrote:

  "Quite a few Christian widows were able to live as Grettr, Lif, and Thyra could."

  Names, Greg, I want their names.

  b

• At July 31, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  Let's see, Brian, there was ...

  Oh, sure, like I can give you names! As I'm sure you know, sources ...

• At July 31, 2009, Michael P. wrote:

  Blank verse *is* unrhymed iambic pentameter.

• At July 31, 2009, Ethan S wrote:

  Having recently acquired that hardcover of Kirby's Demon, I have to say I love the Wednesday Comics version. Sure, Etrigan ...

• At July 31, 2009, Brian Wood wrote:

  Sure, 'rich' being a crucial factor, but the Church was forever trying to devise ways of separating people from their ...

• At July 31, 2009, Brad Curran wrote:

  "Also: Neil Diamond’s sequins are totally part of some magic spell. For serious. You’ll see when I write my epic ...

• At July 31, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  That's true, Brian. I would argue that ninth-century Christianity (Christianity up until the early 13th century, in fact) was ...

• At July 31, 2009, Keith wrote:

  I haven't read Hellblazer yet, but it's on my list to pick up, eventually.

  Does anyone think Milligan makes ...

• At July 31, 2009, Bill Reed wrote:

  Wow, I totally forgot the Coach character ever existed.

  I need to reread X-Force. And X-Statix.

• At July 31, 2009, Stefan wrote:

  Oh wow, I completely missed all those Hercules sound-effects, that's brilliant! Eisner, definitely.

• At August 1, 2009, Stephen wrote:

  "That’s why I always liked Tim Drake before DC decided to start, you know, slaughtering his family – he just ...

• At August 2, 2009, Random Stranger wrote:

  A Harding-themed Batman villain could finally return Gotham to a state of villaincy.

• At August 6, 2009, 3 million Years » Blog Archive » Captain Britain & MI:13 #15 wrote:

  [...] think this from CBR says it [...]

• At August 13, 2009, Red 5 Comics » Blog Archive » Reviews for Red 5 Titles wrote:

  [...] Comic Book Resources Still ridiculously entertaining, surprisingly touching, and Wegener, not surprisingly, draws the crap out of it. I ...

Plus: Nudity and Swearing! And the return of a long-absent publisher! Whoo-hoo! (Seriously, lots of swearing. You've been warned. And no, this is not a judgment about these comics at all. I just bought a lot of comics, and a lot featured swearing and nudity, so I thought it would be fun to compare and contrast.)

First of all, nothing (not even Darwyn Cooke's hardcover adaptation) that came out this week can compare to this:

100 dollars of sheer beautiful awesome. I even have most of these in trade already, but I don't freakin' care. Of course, now I have two trades that I need no longer. I smell a contest!

But let's check out the gigantic heap of comics I got this week. Phew!

Agents of Atlas #8 ("Monster Makers") by Jeff Parker (writer), Carlo Pagulayan (penciler), Jason Paz (inker), Noah Salonga (inker), Jana Schirmer (colorist), Elizabeth Dismang (colorist), and Tom Orzechowski (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, Marvel.

There I am, enjoying an abduction of Bruce Banner by sinister scientists, Norman Osborn getting pissy because Atlas doesn't seem to be on his side anymore, Derek Khanata getting a taste of what it's like to be an Agent of Atlas, hot-tub style, a hilarious Brady Bunch-inspired recap page (all in the first five pages of the comic, mind you), and then Jimmy Woo breaks out this sentence:

But you need a molted dragon scale on you to reflect the radiation inside, and Mr. Lao is stingy with those.

As I commented over on Jeff Parker's blog, it's at that moment that this went from one of Marvel's top five comics to utter lunatic genius. Woo just delivers it so dead-pan, so nonchalantly, like everyone has a sub-dimensional corridor through which they can travel all over the world and which he's about to explore in a floating 1950s car (I'm sure someone knows what brand it is) and why would it be surprising that you need molted dragon scales to get through it? That sentence just sums up not only why this particular comic is brilliant, but why we love comics and will never give up on them. Well played, Mr. Parker, well played!

And that's before the four-armed, three-eyed, backward-footed, genetically-engineered Frankenstein creature shows up with a scientist clamped between his jaws. HELL YEAH!!!!!

Bruce Banner, who was tranked by the sinister scientists on the first page, doesn't take kindly to being a guinea pig, and he turns into some big green monster who seems awfully angry. I'm not entirely sure what's going on with Banner these days - I don't read Loeb's Michael Bay Hulk comic, so is Bruce out of prison or what? I don't really care, because I'm not that caught up with the whole continuity thing, and it's a fun issue seeing how the Agents try to calm him down (Venus doesn't have much of an effect when she tries). Plus, Jimmy Woo ends up facing an old enemy. Oh dear. It's just more of the awesome from Mr. Parker. Man, I hope this book sells well.

I'm continually puzzled by Pagulayan's art. This issue looks fantastic, and both Schirmer and Dismang color it, but the look is consistent throughout. The Hulk is wonderfully monstrous, and the monsters the scientists have created are horrifying and tragic. It appears the lines are stronger and the inking is heavier, not allowing the color to push this into soft focus. I hope the various artists have found a good balance, because the book looks very nice.

This book has been getting better and better, which is nice to see. You really should try it!

Swearing in the comic? It's a Marvel book, so of course not. There aren't even any "Marvelfied" curse words, like "####!"

Nudity in the comic? It's a Marvel book, so of course there is! Oh, wait a minute. Okay, Venus and Namora are in the hot tub at the beginning, nekkid, but some well-placed hair and steam ensures that none of the many kids reading this will be scarred. Well, until the page where the creature gnaws on the scientist's neck. But that's wholesome American violence, not creepy European nekkidness!

All Select Comics #1 ("Murder on Another Planet" and "Marvex the Super Robot") by Marc Guggenheim (writer, "Murder"), Javier Pulido (artist, "Murder"), Javier Rodriguez (artist, "Murder"), and Dave Lanphear (letterer, "Murder"), and Michael Kupperman (writer/artist, "Marvex"). $3.99, 37 pgs (15 reprint pages), FC, Marvel.

I got this because of Kupperman, but I had forgotten that Pulido was drawing the main story, so that was just an added bonus. Oh, and Guggenheim isn't horrible. I can live with him. Pulido does his typical great job on the art, and Guggenheim's murder mystery isn't bad, although the cynic in me guessed the killer, one of the first time I've ever done that (usually I don't try). Still, as a "return" of the Blonde Phantom, it's a solid story. I'm not quite sure about the set-up of the story, which features large white blocks in which Louise narrates the story. It cramps Pulido's art and much of it seems a bit unnecessary. This is most obvious at the end, when he cuts back on it a bit and the story gets better. Still, Guggenheim makes some eerily true observations about the crime and how the survivors feel about it, and the unraveling of the mystery works, although it's not a "fair-play" mystery, unfortunately. It's not a great story, but it's a decent one (and I guess the "secret" to why the Blonde Phantom looks so good for being, what, 90 years old is established enough in Marvel's canon that Guggenheim never addresses it), and with the extras, it makes the price tag worth it.

As for the extra stories ... if you've never read Tales Designed to Thrizzle, you really owe it to yourself to check out Kupperman's work. He gives us a story of Marvex, a super-robot from the fifth dimension. It's fascinating to read the two reprints from 1940 of Hal Sharp's Marvex stories, because Sharp's tales are typically Golden Age wacky, and Kupperman channels that magnificently, making his story hilarious without, it feels, indulging in any ironic detachment from the originals. Marvex really does keep taking off his clothes, so why wouldn't he do it when Kupperman writes/draws him? People in the original do give him money, so why wouldn't people in Kupperman's story? Plus, we get the menace of ... Ingrediento! Fear him! Like his indy work, Kupperman has a beautifully twisted sense of humor, and although this story isn't quite as surreal as Tales is (it's far more surreal than almost everything else Marvel publishes these days, but that's not saying much), it's still nice and wacky. And Sharp's original stories are flingin'-flangin' awesome. I'm stunned Kurt Busiek didn't add Marvex to the Avengers!

Swearing in the comic? A bit of "Marvelfied" cursing, because that's what we love!

Nudity in the comic? It doesn't count, of course, but if you like naked robot torso, this is the book for you!

Buck Rogers #2 ("Future Shock Part Two: Animal Husbandry") by Scott Beatty (writer), Carlos Rafael (artist), Carlos Lopez (colorist), and Simon Bowland (letterer). $3.50, 22 pgs, FC, Dynamite Entertainment.

I'm still feeling out this book, but Beatty is doing a good job with it so far. This issue gives us much more backstory about Buck and how he actually got to the future, which we knew already, sort of, but which Beatty makes more plausible than you might expect. We also get the introduction of Princess Ardala, which is fun. Most of the issue takes place in the "past," until the very end of the issue, when Buck and Wilma escape from a bit of a horror-show factory and its fusion worms. Charming things, those. It's a solid issue, but it's a bit early to decide about it. Decent story, good art, and the potential for Buck to hook up with two Deerings half a millennium apart. Ewwww.

Swearing in the comic? Does "ass" count? I'm going to count it.

Nudity in the comic? None. Come on, Beatty and Rafael, step up! Do you think a good story and good art is going to sell the book????

Domino Lady #1 ("Blooded" and "Orange Blossom Murders Part One") by Nancy Holder (writer), Danny Sempere (artist, "Blooded"), Leeahd Goldberg (artist, "Orange Blossom Murders"), Jason Jensen (colorist), Renato Guerra (colorist), and Josh Aitken (letterer). $3.99, 27 pgs, FC, Moonstone.

I believe I ordered issue #2 of this series, and unless it gets better, I won't be continuing with it (unless it's only two issues, of course). It's not the worst thing you'll ever read, but it features almost every pulp cliché you can pile onto a story, and while it's kind of fun, it's definitely not worth four dollars every issue. The fact that Holder fails some of the basics of storytelling doesn't help. For instance, everything in the book points to it being set during the 1930s, which is fine. Then, in one panel, it looks like someone is using a digital camera. Now, maybe he's not, but it definitely looks like one. Sherlock Holmes also shows up in the first story, and we're supposed to take his presence for granted - Domino Lady (whose real name is Ellen) simply narrates that he knows about her secret identity. Plus, when he shows up, he's "disguised" as a Chinese man, and she doesn't know who he is, but then immediately recognizes him. It's weird. It's kind of exemplary of the first story as a whole - things happen at lightning speed, and although it's a fairly simplistic mystery, it's tough to follow in places. The second story slows down a bit (it's also "to be continued," so that's probably why), and it seems a bit more complex, but it still feels like a riff on Chinatown.

It's not a complete waste of time. It's refreshing to read Holder's take on the main character, as she's completely amoral in her pursuit of the bad guys and, as a woman, knows how to use sex to her advantage and, you know, seems to enjoy it. It's kind of a nice twist, especially when you consider someone like the Blonde Phantom from the comic above this one, who's kind of the same character but simply beats people up instead of screwing them. And the art from Sempere and Goldberg does a decent job setting the scene and giving a pulp vibe to everything. Both artists enjoy their cheesecake (I'm not terribly sure if Ellen and her female lover - presumably they're lovers - need to be lounging around in barely-hanging-on lingerie, but what the hell), but there's nothing wrong with that, is there? There is? Dang.

Like I wrote, I think I ordered issue #2, and I hope the writing improves. I'd like to like this series, but we'll have to see if it gets better.

Swearing in the comic? Not even a little bit.

Nudity in the comic? The fear of nipples continues, but there's a topless hooker, Ellen changes clothes in an alley, because why not?, Ellen gets two different men in bed, and once she's al fresco, and she changes clothes later and surprisingly is not wearing a bra, which would seem to not work with the flimsy clothing she's wearing. Good times!

Fables #86 by Bill Willingham (writer), Jim Fern (penciller), Craig Hamilton (inker), Lee Loughridge (colorist), and Todd Klein (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, DC/Vertigo.

Now that the interminable Great Fables Crossover is over, Willingham has turned back into a good writer and gives us a nice tale about the Dark Man and how he came to be trapped in a box. He was trapped by Boxers, of course! Seriously. No, not those Boxers. There's nothing really to say about it, because it doesn't move the regular plot along too much but does give us a lot of information about the history of the Empire and the way horrible Fables were dealt with, and the Dark Man has been a really creepy dude since he first showed up, so it's nice to see him getting a bit of the spotlight here. Fern, who drew the two-part story about those wooden people who went to spy on Fabletown (whatever their names are), does a good job filling in, giving us two very nice double-page spreads of the Boxers fighting Baba Yaga and then the Dark Man. It's just a fine return to form for the comic after Jack highjacked it into crappiness for three issues.

And I'd love to see the boxing of the Janky Man. He's so janky!

Swearing in the comic? Sorry, no.

Nudity in the comic? For a Vertigo book, there's a distressing lack of cussin' and nekkidness in this title. Sheesh. Doesn't Willingham know that swearing and nudity, plus having one of your characters lick the skull of Batman and having another eat another character's heart, makes your book "mature"?*

* Sorry, I couldn't resist.

Fallen Angel: Reborn #1 by Peter David (writer), J. K. Woodward (artist/colorist), and Chris Mowry (letterer). $3.99, 22 pgs, FC, IDW.

Fallen Angel, for over 50 issues, was a fantastic comic, so I was happy to see that David hadn't given up on it yet and has brought it back for at least five issues (I think this is a five-issue mini-series). That being said, this first issue is entirely devoted to the guest star, Illyria, and as I didn't watch Angel (despite the presence of hunky David Boreanaz), I wasn't that invested in it. Luckily, David gives us plenty of information about her, and it's fairly easy to follow along with what's going on. She doesn't like being a hot chick and wants to be a helmet-wearing tentacle demon again (who wouldn't?). So Mr. Good of the Hierarchy gives her one task: Kill Liandra. She ends up in Bete Noire, attacks that snake guy who eats unsuspecting tourists (his name escapes me) because she knows him from old, and as the issue ends, she runs afoul of Liandra for claiming that Bete Noire is her city. It's all very dramatic!

Woodward's art, which I've always liked, looks even better than it did when last we visited Bete Noire. I'm not sure what the difference is. It's a bit softer in places, but the painting looks better, and the introduction of Illyria in Hell is beautifully horrifying. There's still a bit of stiffness occasionally in the poses, but other than that, it looks very nice. I just can't quite put my finger on why it's better. Forgive me!

Anyway, it's nice to see Fallen Angel back. I can't imagine David's done with the characters, so it will be interesting to see where he goes with them in this series and beyond.

Swearing in the comic? There's an "asshole." And I'm sorry, but "puissance" just sounds naughty.

Nudity in the comic? None. Well, the demons don't seem to wearing any clothes, but do we really need to see naked demons?

Incognito #5 (of 6) by Ed Brubaker (writer), Sean Phillips (artist), and Val Staples (colorist). $3.50, 25 pgs, FC, Marvel/Icon.

"Penultimate issues are always the quickest, right?" asks Mr. Brubaker in the backmatter of this comic (right before yet another excellent essay by Jess Nevins - sheesh, what doesn't he know about pop culture of the past 150 years?), and while I don't know about that, I do know that penultimate issues often contain the most answers (except for the BIG ANSWER, which always comes at the very end, of course), and this issue is no exception. We learn a great deal about Ava Destruction and her relationship with Zack's brother and why that really, really creeped Zack out (yeah, it would make me uncomfortable, too), plus her big problem with life and, well, its end. We also learn more about Zack himself, what Dr. Lester is doing, and why the heck there are superpowered beings in this comic in the first place! Phew! Man, that's a lot to take in. But, perhaps not surprisingly, it's excellent. Oh, like I'm going to say anything else. There are a lot of Internet people writing stuff like, "You know, as much as I like Incognito, I'll be happy when Criminal comes back." You know what, Internet people? You don't deserve to read Incognito. Put it down now! Quit yer whining. It's a Brubaker/Phillips comic. What the hell else do you need to know? It could be an entire Brubaker/Phillips issue devoted to the debate over an obscure bill on the House floor and it would be more compelling than 90% of the stuff out there. So shut up already and enjoy it.

Swearing in the comic? Duh. Let's break it down! Fuck (or a variation thereof): 18. Shit: 11 (8 in one word balloon). Damn: 3. Bitch: 2. Ass: 1. The C-word: 1.* Plus a couple of Jesuses, if you want to count those. That's 36 (or 38) in this issue. Will it win the prize???? (Here's a hint: Not even close.)

Nudity in the comic? Mai oui! Two panels of naked groupies, and three panels of naked Ava, but always in silhouette, because nude scenes aren't in her contract, man!

* I refuse to use it or even type it. That's just how I roll.

The Killer #9 (of 10) by Matz (writer/translator), Luc Jacamon (artist), Edward Gauvin (translator). $3.95, 27 pgs, FC, Archaia.

With the exception of Mouse Guard, which I assume is their best-seller, it's been a long, loooooong time since we've seen a comic from Archaia. Now it looks like they have their shit together, which is excellent, as they generally put out really high-quality stuff for not much more than regular comics. I mean, this is 27 pages of story for less than a few Marvel books, and it's intense, powerful, and looks great. At this point, you might think it would be difficult to get into the story, but Matz does a fine job at least making sure we get the general idea behind the series, and we get a bunch of answers about what's been going on (that penultimate issue syndrome again). It sets up what I can only assume will be a bloody finale, with our unnamed assassin having more at stake than he knows, if the final panel is any indication (although, to be honest, I wasn't sure where his lady friend was in that panel). Jacamon's art is typically beautiful, with the cool blue of the nightclub contrasting nicely with the hot red of the bedroom. The first panel is a marvelous evocation of both the killer's home environment and the kind of person he is.

I'm very keen on reading how this all shakes out in the final issue, but I'm more jazzed by the fact that Archaia is publishing comics again. Yay!

Swearing in the comic? Some. A "bitch" and "son of a bitch," three uses of "fuck," two uses of "shit," and one each of "asshole" and "bastard." I know "bitch" and "bastard" are perfectly acceptable terms in some contexts, but not in these!

Nudity in the comic? Well, it's a European comic, and if there's one thing those socialists like, it's nudity, right??? There's sex in this book, so we get nine panels of female nudity. Stay away if you think seeing female pubic hair might lead you to commit depraved crimes!

The Last Resort #1 ("Two Goats") by Jimmy Palmiotti (writer), Justin Gray (writer), Giancarlo Caracuzzo (artist), and Chris Mowry (letterer). $3.99, 22 pgs, FC, IDW.

Those of you who actually read these reviews (I know, what are the chances of that?) might recall that I've been a bit disappointed with Power Girl, to the point where Amanda Conner's art might not even keep me reading. It's more frustrating because I know Palmiotti and Gray can do good comics work, and why PG seems to be lacking a spark makes no sense to me (I know, it's only two issues in, so I'm not giving up quite yet, but it doesn't look good). Now, you might say I need to give it more than two issues, but here's the thing: This is the first issue of The Last Resort, Palmiotti and Gray's latest less mainstream offering, and I'm totally sold. In the first few pages, we get a dude coming out of the surf onto a Caribbean island and eating a lifeguard, and while I don't necessarily want to see that in a mainstream superhero book, it's a nice jolt of horror here. Then Palmiotti and Gray show us a bunch of people getting on a plane to go to Aruba, but we all know they're going to end up on the island with the lifeguard-eating dude, and of course they do. Palmiotti and Gray then end on an unusual note that seems to negate a lot of what they've done, characterization-wise, throughout the issue. But they begin with a compelling creepy event and end with a bang. It's certainly not a great comic, but it's a blast to read, and the script crackles with energy, as opposed to the first two issues of Power Girl, which felt oddly enervating (despite the presence of a giant super-intelligent ape). Conner is better than Caracuzzo, but the art in this book is nothing to sneeze at, as it fits the horror feel Palmiotti and Gray are going for. Caracuzzo does a nice job with a very large cast, which is good to see.

As this is a homage (of sorts) to disaster movies of the 1970s, Palmiotti and Gray introduce a large group of people who are flying to Aruba, many of whom will be (presumably) killed off in horrible ways. With limited space to work, they manage to give us a bunch of thumbnail sketches of our principals, and even though a lot of them are the kind of people we'd root for to get killed (oh, please, like you don't do that when you watch these kinds of movies), Palmiotti and Gray still do a good job establishing their characters. Sure, they skirt the edges of stereotype, but not as much as you might expect.

I'm not entirely sure how many issues this is (IDW has an annoying habit of not telling us in Previews or putting it on their covers), but if you're a fan of epic disaster movies and nice gory horror, you might want to give this a try. It can't hurt!

Swearing in the comic? Oh yeah. Breakin' it down again: Fuck and its permutations: 10. Shit: 3. Bitch: 2. Hell: 2. Cock: 1 (I don't know if that counts, but it always sounds really dirty to me). Dickhead: 1. C-word: 1. Jesus: 1 (as in taking the Lord's name in vain; someone else thanks Jesus, so I don't think that counts).

Nudity in the comic? You bet. There are at most five topless women in the first few pages, as the Caribbean island on which the lifeguard eater appears on is, apparently, one of the more relaxed ones. A character on the plane likes having sex in unusual places, so she's flashing her breasts in four different panels. Both times she has sex, it's kind of humorous - nicely played by Palmiotti and Gray.

Poe #1 (of 4) by J. Barton Mitchell (writer), Dean Kotz (artist), Digikore Studios (colorist), and Marshall Dillon (letterer). $3.99, 22 pgs, FC, Boom! Studios.

The last time Boom! had a comic that featured historical figures doing things they never did in real life, I didn't like it very much (Galveston). But based on this first issue, Poe will be different. It helps that Kotz is a good artist (he's not as good as Guy Davis, but he has a Davis vibe going on), bringing the mid-nineteenth century to life quite well, and Mitchell does a nice job setting up both E. A. Poe's state of mind following the death of his wife as well as the murder mystery, parts of which Poe deduces in true Holmesian manner (considering Poe wrote what is regarded as the first detective story, it's not too much of a stretch). It's a good solid hard-boiled murder mystery, and the addition of some supernatural elements don't make it too outlandish. So far, this is a good start to the mini-series.

(Does anyone want to debate what the Latin means? It's "Afficio Fortis Abiga," if you must know. "Afficio" is first person present singular, so "I use" or "handle" or "affect" or even "attack." "Fortis" means "brave" or "strong," and I can't figure out "abiga." It must be a form of "abigo," but I'm not sure what form it is. Any guesses? Man, it's been too long since I deciphered Latin.)

Swearing in the comic? Of course not - they were very proper back in 1847.

Nudity in the comic? I don't think anyone ever got naked prior to the 1920s. I'm not sure how they made babies, but I think I'm right.

Robotika: For a Few Rubles More #1 & 2 by Alex Sheikman (story/artist/letterer), David Moran (story/scripter), and Joel Chua (colorist). $4.99, 56 pgs, FC, Archaia.

The other Archaia book out this week is the double-sized Robotika, which collects the first issue (which actually came out) and the second issue (which never saw the light of day). That means you get two full comics for 5 dollars. What a bargain for you!

Robotika, as you know, is the brainchild of Alex Sheikman, who gave us the first mini-series unassisted and then brought on Moran to help with the writing aspect, as it was fairly obvious Sheikman was much better on the art side (not that he's a bad writer, but you can tell he's a novice). The writing has improved on this series, but the draw of this series remains Sheikman's art, which is absolutely spectacular. I thought issue #2 was done quite some time ago, but the art on it looks even better than it does in issue #1, so maybe Sheikman went back and added something to it. Beats me.

What we basically get in these two issues is a futuristic Western with samurai overtones, much like the first series, all of which leads to revelations about some characters and stand-offs between others and a beautifully choreographed fight scene that leaves some people we wouldn't have expected dead. There's a drug dealer who didn't get paid and wants to be, a drug buyer who has no interest in paying, and out intrepid trio of cowboys/samurai/mercenaries caught in the middle. There is shit, and it hits the fan.

I really can't gush enough about Sheikman's art. The book is exciting, yes, but it's also gorgeous, and Sheikman has a wonderful sense of design, both of characters and background but even in composing a page. He builds tension wonderfully, incorporates sound effects into the panels nicely, and even adds some nice touches of humor. I'm really excited to see the conclusion of this story, and I hope someone gives Sheikman some work. I'd do it, but I think he's out of my league, man!

Swearing in the comic? Ten "damns" and seven "hells" (heh). Most of them come from the mouth of Beppe, the drug dealer. He's kind of angry.

Nudity in the comic? None.

Scalped #30 ("The Gnawing Part One of Five") by Jason Aaron (writer), R. M. Guéra (artist), Giulia Brusco (colorist), and Steve Wands (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, DC/Vertigo.

Scalped inspired me to do my theme for this week, because I don't think I've seen this much cursing since your average episode of Deadwood, so I decided to see how it matched up against the other comics I bought this week. Of course, it's utterly brilliant, but that goes without saying, doesn't it?

I mean, here we are, with all the threads coming together. I don't know how long Aaron plans to write this book, but it feels like big things are brewing, and I'm not sure how our hero, Dash Bad Horse, can navigate the dangerous waters he's in. He goes to pick up Diesel from jail down south in Nebraska (that's where he's stashed, isn't it?) and ends up with Catcher, who has many interesting things to say to Bad Horse as they head back to the reservation. Catcher escapes, but that's not important right now. What's important is that Red Crow wants Bad Horse to find the FBI agent who's infiltrated his organization. This, understandably, freaks Bad Horse out a bit, as he's the FBI agent. Both Red Crow and Agent Nitz, Bad Horse's boss, want to squeeze him to see if he breaks. Plus, there's that nasty old Asian gentleman in Red Crow's jail - the one that could lead Johnny Tongue showing up and killing everyone. Just another fun issue of Scalped, right?

This is really a great read. Yes, it's hard to follow if you haven't been reading the book (not surprising), but even if you pick it up at random, you get the sense of Aaron's excellent writing and how he builds tension and makes all the characters squirm. When Red Crow gets Johnny Tongue on the phone, you sincerely have no idea where Aaron is going with the conversation, and when you find out, it's an amazing and horrifying moment. And even if you know nothing about Dash Bad Horse, Aaron makes his situation real and fairly untenable, and when he's on the phone with Nitz, we can feel his panic. Guéra, of course, adds to the entire feel of the book very well, from the sinister presence of Catcher in the back seat of Bad Horse's squad car to the violence later in the issue. The fill-in artists have always been quite good on this book, but Guéra is amazing.

Aaron really hasn't had a weak moment on this book, and with this issue, he ups the ante a bit more. That means even better comics!

Swearing in the comic? Shit yeah! It's time for a breakdown! Fuck and/or its many glorious variations: 49. Shit: 12. Damn: 7. Ass: 6. Bastard: 3. Bitch: 3. N-word: 2.* Hell: 1. Dick: 1. Cocksucker: 1. That's 85 swear words in one comic. It's almost a symphony of swearing. There are 119 panels in this comic, so Aaron doesn't quite get in a swear word per panel, but on the first two pages, neither character curses (8 panels) and there are 24 panels in which no words are spoken. Therefore, if we ignore the calm conversation on the first two pages and the silent panels, there are 89 panels in which someone speaks. That means you almost have a 100% chance of finding a curse word when someone opens their mouth in the final 20 pages of this comic. That's goddamn motherfucking awesome. Seriously - I'm not kidding. It's breathtaking how much people curse in this comic. If it were Ian McShane doing the talking, it would sound like profane Shakespeare.

Nudity in the comic? Surprisingly, there's only one panel where we see a topless woman. This isn't the issue for nakedness, apparently - there's too much cursing!

* Another one I won't use.

Sherlock Holmes #3 (of 5) ("The Trial of Sherlock Holmes Part Three: A Killer on the Loose") by Leah Moore and John Reppion (writers), Aaron Campbell (artist), Tony Aviña (colorist), and Simon Bowland (letterer). $3.50, 22 pgs, FC, Dynamite Entertainment.

As I wrote last time this came out, it's very difficult, after the initial mystery has been established, to review this, as it's very much a chapter-by-chapter kind of thing, so, for instance, this ends with a conversation between Holmes and his brother Mycroft. Not very exciting, that. However, Moore and Reppion continue to build their story slowly but surely, with a nosy reporter trying to find out what happened to Holmes, someone trying to take Holmes out (and we're not even sure if they know he's Holmes, as he's disguised), and an assassination attempt on Baron Lothair. Despite not revealing how all of this ties together (and why would they?), Moore and Reppion are doing a good job keeping all their balls in the air, so why wouldn't I stick with it? Unlike something where the payoff is years down the line, this is a five-issue mini-series, so they have to wrap things up soon, don't they? I can enjoy the mystery until then, I reckon.

Swearing in the comic? Someone says "damned," and someone else says "What the devil?" Shocking!

Nudity in the comic? Remember Poe up there? No one got naked in the Victorian Age!

Super Friends #17 ("Just in Time") by Sholly Fisch (writer), Stewart McKenny (penciller), Dan Davis (inker), Travis Lanham (letterer), and Heroic Age (colorist). $2.50, 18 pgs, FC, DC.

I'd like to buy "adult" comics more (ones that feature panels like this for instance), but when the kids' ones are this awesome, I just can't!

So the Justice League fights Chronos, who changed history so that he rules the United States. Apparently, he went back to 2 July 1776 and didn't allow the Declaration of Independence to be signed and defeated George Washington, so the Super Friends go back in time to stop him. Yeah, that's it, but Fisch adds so much keen stuff that the script just sings. I mean, Flash investigates what's going on and still manages to fit in a Nationals game? Awesome. Well, except for the fact that he's a Nationals fan. What's up with that? Then there's the quiz about famous patriots' quotes, with Wonder Woman's old skull hair style. Then there's Aquaman riding a flying Superman saying "Yippee!" Then there's Chronos wearing a powdered wig and his super-villain costume. Fisch deftly skirts over the whole slave issue (especially considering that noted slave-owner Thomas Jefferson shows up in this book), and it's just another great issue of Super Friends.

And someone should tell Chronos that super-villains don't freakin' cry! What's wrong with him????

Swearing in the comic? Um, no.

Nudity in the comic? Surprisingly, Wonder Woman engages in some graphic hard-core sex with Ben Franklin and John Adams. Oh, come on - I'm not serious, people!

The Unknown #3 (of 4) by Mark Waid (writer), Minck Oosterveer (artist), Fellipe Martins (colorist), and Marshall Dillon (letterer). $3.99, 22 pgs, FC, Boom! Studios.

As cool as this comic is - and it is - this is a somewhat curious issue. I don't think I should give it away, so I won't. We meet the bad guy, Catherine and Doyle discover the big scheme, and Oosterveer draws the heck out it, but it's odd, as the big scheme doesn't seem all that horrible. I mean, the bad guy commits murder, sure, but I'm not sure he has to in the context of the book, and I'm not sure the other stuff he's doing is really illegal. It seems like what a lot of parents wish they could do. Catherine gets grumpy about it, but not necessarily because it's really evil - she gets grumpy because it offends her sensibilities. I'm certainly not saying that the bad guy isn't bad, but I wonder if he'd be better off forming a PAC and doing things through the proper channels.

Still, I love the art, and Waid's writing is solid. Plus, the creepy dude does something creepy. We'll see what happens next issue.

Swearing in the comic? There's an "ass."

Nudity in the comic? No, but Catherine still has that shirt wider open than might be necessary.

Unthinkable #3 (of 5) by Mark Sable (writer), Julian Totino Tedesco (artist), Juan Manuel Tumburús (colorist), and Ed Dukeshire (letterer). $3.99, 22 pgs, FC, Boom! Studios.

Here's another book that seems to be getting better as Sable slows down a bit. The first issue flew by, the second barely caught its breath, and this one slows down even more, and it's nice. Ripley and his krewe stop something awful from happening in Israel, then head someplace else to stop something else. Sable does something interesting with the script, as the president's State of the Union seems to indicate that all is not as bad as we've been led to believe. Of course, the State of the Union is propaganda, but it's an intriguing possibility that Sable floats here. Tedesco's art has been solid throughout, and when Ripley escapes from confinement, the violence is horrifying and all too real. As Sable calms down a bit and lets the story unfold in its own manner instead of rushing it, Tedesco remains the solid foundation of the series. It seems like the story is catching up to the art, which is good to see. As with far too many mini-series, this will probably read much better in trade, but this issue, at least, is a fine slice of comic bookery.

Swearing in the comic? None at all.

Nudity in the comic? Not really, although "the editor" is topless, and fat guys shouldn't be topless. Believe me, I know.

Wednesday Comics #2 (of 12). $3.99, 15 pgs, FC, DC.

I'm sure this will become easier to write about as the stories really take shape, because right now it's just about which writers are comfortable with the format and which aren't. Dave Gibbons ("Kamandi"), Dave Bullock ("Deadman"), Neil Gaiman ("Metamorpho"), Paul Pope ("Adam Strange"), Dan DiDio ("Metal Men"), Karl Kerschl ("Flash/Iris West"), Walt Simonson ("Demon/Catwoman") and Kyle Baker ("Hawkman") seem to be able to milk the single-page format for maximum tension and effect, with each of their stories ending with a nice kicker, while Brian Azzarello ("Batman"), John Arcudi ("Superman"), Kurt Busiek ("Green Lantern"), Eddie Berganza ("Teen Titans"), Jimmy Palmiotti ("Supergirl"), Ben Caldwell ("Wonder Woman"), and Adam Kubert ("Sgt. Rock") just ... don't. The latter stories seem to be longer tales that just happen to be divided by the page break. That's not to say they won't be good as a complete whole, but with this format, the former stories leave you on a high note, desperate for the next week to find out what will happen next, while the latter stories ... well, you can wait and read the entire thing. It's actually quite fascinating to see the two kinds of stories side by side. Between the Azzarello story and the Arcudi story, both of which end extremely awkwardly, we get Gibbons and Sook dazzling us with a battle against giant rats that feels more meaty than the other two. I'm curious to see where all three are going, but I wasn't as jazzed by the Batman and Superman stories, while the Kamandi one was oodles of fun.

And, of course, the "issue" ends with these words: "Next week: Mile-high clubbing!" Any comic that ends with that is worth it, in my book.

Swearing in the comic? Boston Brand says "The hell it ain't!" and "What the hell?" But that's just like him, isn't it?

Nudity in the comic? Not so much.

X-Factor #46 ("X-it Strategy") by Peter David (writer), Marco Santucci (penciler), Pat Davidson (inker), Jeromy Cox (colorist), and Cory Petit (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, Marvel.

In the post-Rob Liefeld Is A Crazy Homophobe world, David throws in a Rictor/Shatterstar kiss that I would believe is just a gratuitous shot at Liefeld if the script hadn't been finished long before Ol' Rob had his meltdown. But I like to imagine David sitting there at his typewriter thinking, "Well, I was going to spend this entire issue on the future and what happened to Monet, but I think I'll write in a make-out panel just to make Rob's head explode!" My world is so much more interesting than the real one.

Anyway, the bulk of this issue is Monet fighting Darwin and the future peeps confronting Doom. It's a typical very good issue of X-Factor, made more awesome by the surprise guest star at the end. I may be the only person in creation beside his creators who thought that dude was way cool. I'm just concerned that David has a bump on the head that makes him think it's 1991 and not 2009. Someone should get him a CT scan, stat!

Tim Callahan's crazy negative opinions about this book notwithstanding, it continues to roll merrily along, and I'm perfectly happy to let David write as long as he wants to. If only to make Mr. Liefeld twist himself in knots trying to defend his weird objections to Shatterstar mackin' on another dude.

Swearing in the comic? Nope.

Nudity in the comic? Well, Monet is naked the entire book, but she also has what looks like a purple transmode virus covering her entire body, so don't get your fanboy hormones all ratcheted up!

Young Liars #17 ("A Woman Scorned") by David Lapham (writer/artist), Lee Loughridge (colorist), and Jared K. Fletcher (letterer). $2.99, 22 pgs, FC, DC/Vertigo.

And then there's Young Liars. After last issue's decent but weirdly boring issue that not even an authority as respected as Chad Nevett could convince me was brilliant (although he made a valiant effort), we get back to, well, clowns raping people with what appears to be a feather duster. I could be wrong, though. Oh, and a head in a freezer. You know, the normal madness. And I can't even fathom what's happening on the bottom of page 12, where it appears a giant clown is rampaging through town. It doesn't matter, of course, as next issue is the final one (isn't it?), but dang, I'm going to miss this fucked-up love story. It's exactly like Wuthering Heights!

Swearing in the comic? Lapham knows how to use the Vertigo label, motherfuckers! It's breakdown time! Fuck: 11 (three of those are "fook" from that foreign dude). Shit: 6 (4 in a row from Danny at one point). Damn: 4. Ass: 2. Jesus: 2. Hell: 2. Dick: 1. Not quite the beautiful profanity in Scalped, but not bad, either.

Nudity in the comic? None whatsoever.

So that's the week. Dear Lord, that's a lot of comics. I bought 19 individual issues, and in 7 of them, there's some female nudity, although only in 4 does anyone dare show nipples (nipples rot the mind, don't you know). But the swearing, oh the swearing! Check this out!

Fuck: 91.
Shit: 34.
Damn: 25.
Hell: 14.
Ass: 13.
Bitch: 9.
Jesus (as an oath): 5.
Bastard: 4.
Dick: 3.
Cock: 2 (1 is "cocksucker").
The C-word: 2.
The N-word: 2.

I know this is skewed by the masterpiece that is Scalped, but that's still impressive. I don't have a problem with any of them, even the two words I won't use. The only problem I have is when Marvel uses a grawlix in All Select Comics. Come on, Marvel - curse it loud, curse it proud!

Man, I'm glad I'm taking next week off (oh, by the way, I'm taking next week off, at least from reviewing comics, as I'll be ... elsewhere). Reviewing this many comics and paying such close attention to the swearing almost drove me insane. And for some of the time while I was writing these reviews, I was listening to Ice-T's "O. G. Original Gangster." Let the cursing fly! I haven't even been able to speak to the kids for two days for fear I might drop a "cocksucker" into the conversation! That's no good. But let's get to the totally random lyrics!

"There's a club, if you'd like to go
You could meet somebody who really loves you
So you go, and you stand on your own
And you leave on your own
And you go home, and you cry
And you want to die"

Uplifting! If it helps (and it probably won't), this is the only song by this band that I like. See? It's all clear now!

I'm sleepy now. I need a nap.

40 Comments

• At July 17, 2009, Chris Jones wrote:

  I kind of wish you had bought Blackest Night #1 so I could have been like "I agree with you, ...

• At July 17, 2009, Omar Karindu, with the power of SUPER-hypocrisy! wrote:

  What are your feelings on "berk?"

• At July 17, 2009, Rebis wrote:

  @ Chris Jones: No, when the outcome of a reviewer's opinion is already as obviously predetermined as Greg's would be ...

• At July 17, 2009, Chris Jones wrote:

  No, I know.

  I just would've liked to agree with him on this after we/everyone else DISAGREED so much on Green ...

• At July 17, 2009, Thok wrote:

  Given his response to GL 43, Greg's response to Blackest Night 1 would have been predictable.

  (Actually maybe not, since he ...

• At July 17, 2009, Alan Coil wrote:

  "...naked robot torso..."

  Best mental image of the week.

  ___________________________

  "He was trapped by Boxers, of course!"

  Gives new meaning to Boxing Day.

  _________________

  Like the ...

• At July 17, 2009, Bill Reed wrote:

  Strangely enough...

  http://www.the-isb.com/?p=1886

• At July 17, 2009, Michael P. wrote:

  The snake guy's name is Benny.

• At July 17, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  I like how everyone assumes I'd hate Blackest Night. I guess when the outcome of a book is so ...

• At July 17, 2009, Tom Fitzpatrick wrote:

  Nice to see SCALPED has its day/week/month/year.

  Step on up, Aaron!

• At July 17, 2009, Da Fug wrote:

  Have fun Comicconning next week! You must set foot on THE BOAT. And although I only skim the ...

• At July 17, 2009, Rebis wrote:

  @ Chris again: "I just would’ve liked to agree with him on this after we/everyone else DISAGREED so much ...

• At July 18, 2009, JackKing wrote:

  I don't hate Johns nor am I squeamish around gore but I'm not buying Blackest Night either. I just can't ...

• At July 18, 2009, knivesinwest11 wrote:

  how could "How Soon is Now?" be the only Smiths song you like? what is wrong with you?! This Charming ...

• At July 18, 2009, Stephen wrote:

  You know what? If I know I'm going to be getting zombies as the driving force of an event comic, ...

• At July 18, 2009, Philip Ayres wrote:

  My copy of the CB trade hasn't turned up yet so can you answer a question for me Greg: ...

• At July 18, 2009, Çteve! wrote:

  I agree with knivesinwest11. It's like trying to guess the answer out of the lyrics of "Stairway to Heaven" !

• At July 18, 2009, Omar Karindu, with the power of SUPER-hypocrisy! wrote:

  Rubber Ring, Rusholme Ruffians. the Headmaster Ritual, You've Got Everything Now,and Girl Afraid are damned good too.

• At July 18, 2009, joshschr wrote:

  I picked Agents of Atlas, looked at the large handful of comics I already had this week, and put it ...

• At July 18, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  Ah, Rebis, I was just having some fun. I really try not to buy things I'm almost positive I'm ...

• At July 18, 2009, Omar Karindu, with the power of SUPER-hypocrisy! wrote:

  The idea that Morrissey's lyrics, at least in the Smiths days, are "whiny" is pretty mistaken. Generally, he takes ...

• At July 18, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  See, Omar, now I might have to go an re-listen to some Smiths songs. Damn you!!!!!

• At July 18, 2009, Omar Karindu, with the power of SUPER-hypocrisy! wrote:

  Hey, nothing I said makes Morrissey's voice any less flat -- just look up some lyrics; it's faster, for one ...

• At July 18, 2009, Philip Ayres wrote:

  I'm one issue shy of having the Thorpe CBs in the original form. Still looking forward to this !

• At July 18, 2009, knivesinwest11 wrote:

  Omar, you're absolutely correct. and lets not forget that a lot of Moz's lyrics are extremely tongue-in-cheek. i feel that ...

• At July 18, 2009, danjack wrote:

  Dude! Are we discussing Comics or great, awesome music from the late 70s and early 80s! Grrrrrr...........

• At July 18, 2009, Bill Reed wrote:

  - Alt text no worky in Firefox.

  - I am totally bringing Marvex back into current continuity. You know. When I ...

• At July 18, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  "Grawlix" is a pretty awesome word, isn't it?

• At July 18, 2009, Ian A. wrote:

  "Grawlix" is from Mort Walker's Lexicon of Comicana.

• At July 18, 2009, Chad Nevett wrote:

  Disagree about your complaints with the Azzarello/Risso "Batman" strip in "Wednesday Comics." I find each page works very well on ...

• At July 18, 2009, DjeD wrote:

  So who wins the swear word contest? Scalped or Preacher? Anybody counting?

• At July 18, 2009, Tom wrote:

  Wonderful Marvex review. Here's 20 dollars.

• At July 19, 2009, FunkyGreenJerusalem wrote:

  I like when you have weeks like this Greg, I don't feel as silly buying the insane amount of books ...

• At July 19, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  The only thing I disagree with you on, FGJ, is the Superman one. Yes, it looks great, but did ...

• At July 19, 2009, FunkyGreenJerusalem wrote:

  Yes, it looks great, but did we really need to see Superman and Batman trying to out-emo each other?

  YES!

  Well, no, ...

• At July 20, 2009, Philip Ayres wrote:

  My Captain Britain's here now.

  Onwe small problem - the Captain America issues predate the New Mutants annual by ...

• At July 20, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  FGJ: That's me - Mr. Hater! It's so much fun! :)

  Philip: Yeah, I wasn't sure why they stuck ...

• At July 20, 2009, Mike Loughlin wrote:

  And speaking of Captain America, did you read issue 601? I'm surprised that no one is talking about it. (Except ...

• At July 21, 2009, Greg Burgas wrote:

  Mike: I buy Cap in Giant-Sized Omnibus format, so I didn't read it. Yet.

• At July 22, 2009, Philip Ayres wrote:

  A question about another product on last week's shipping list:

  My copy of Essential Marvel Two In One v3 has just ...

Atomic Robo: Shadow from Beyond Time #2 by Brian Clevinger, Scott Wegener, Ronda Pattison, and Jeff Powell (Red 5)

This, my friends, was my favorite comic from June 2009. Mark it in your ledger!

Brian Clevinger and Scott Wegener have perfected their shared wavelength and created the most entertaining comic on the stands. Clevinger's plotting is perfectly pared down to the essentials-- after all that fun banter and exposition in part one, this episode's all action, but not without its fair share of hilarious dialogue, be it Charles Fort's mixture of eagerness and incredulity ("Edison would never allow the likes of you or I near his necrophone"), or Robo's carphone conversation with Nikola Tesla, in which he tries to act like nothing's wrong and he's not chasing down a giant Lovecraftian (literally!) beastie with a carful of lightning guns. Meanwhile, Wegener's artwork is crispier than fried chicken, his facial cartooning brilliant-- it's marvelous how he can eke so much emotion out of a character who, by all rights, doesn't have a face.

It's in the last handful of pages, however, where Clev and Weg (as they shall now be known) really hit me, as Robo literally turns things up to 11 and the reader is handed the most badass, exciting comic book moment I've read in ages. It's flawlessly paced, the epitome of action storytelling. "There's one underlying scientific principle common to all existence. ... Everything explodes." That's the best way to describe Atomic Robo-- explosively awesome. And not in the "Taco Bell put the fear of God in me" way.

Batman & Robin #1 by Grant Morrison, Frank Quitely, Alex Sinclair, and Pat Brosseau (DC)

I suppose the title is technically "Batman and Robin," but I enjoy typing ampersands. What can I say about this comic that hasn't already been said? Nothing, probably. Heck, reviews of the second ish are already out and I've just sat down with the first! Egads, Bill, get with the times! Batman & Robin #1 is so last month!

G-Mo and F-Qui have this thing down to a literal science by now. They have become such a well-oiled machine that one expects nothing less than perfection from their collaborations, and we pretty much get that here. I loved the hell out of this thing, from the vibrant yellow background on the cover to the flying Batmobile to Quitely putting the sound effects into the art to the decrepit remnants of the giant mechanical dinosaur to the cutaway of the Bat-Bunker (which I did hope would be a bigger drawing, I admit), to Damian calling Alfred "Pennyworth" to the paracapes to the brilliantly disturbing new baddie Pyg. And now I'm out of breath. But yes, absolutely gorgeous and electric, giving me the same chills I got with Morrison and Quitely's first issue of New X-Men. You might as well call this New Batman, because that's what it is. I didn't think I'd care about Dick Grayson in the Batsuit, but I'd read it forever if these two Scottish blokes were in charge. Really, there is no need for another Batman comic besides this one.

So there, I've just repeated what everybody else said. But man! What a cool comic! Why couldn't Morrison's whole run to date have been like this?

Beta Ray Bill: Godhunter #1 by Kieron Gillen, Kano, Alvaro Lopez, Javier Rodriguez, and Nate Piekos (Marvel)

Kieron Gillen writing pop comics about hip music and the cool cats who dance to it? I can't wrap my brain around that. Kieron Gillen writing an action comic about a space horse with the power of a Norse god who decides to kill an unstoppable force that devours planets? Hell yeah, sign me up.

I get the feeling that Gillen's going to be a big name in a couple years, one of those go-to guys at Marvel who follow the same path as Matt Fraction or Jason Aaron-- they'll wow you with their early creator-owned work and then start spinning cool superhero yarns, but they gotta start by paying their dues. And so Kieron Gillen gets to write a mini-series about one of my favorite characters, the noble alien warrior with a face like a dead horse who shares my name and flies a talking spaceship named Skuttlebutt. I'm surprised to see Beta Ray Bill getting the spotlight as regularly as he has been, what with the mini-series and one-shots and team books he's appeared in over the last few years. What once was maybe a novelty pet character of Walt Simonson's is apparently a favorite of some editor out there, and so we're blessed with books like Godhunter, which is about the titular Bill deciding Galactus needs to die, and going about the mission. It brings him into contact with SWORD, which puts him in the path of of a being who disintegrates folks with his cosmic organ music-- yes, that happens-- and then into a smackdown with one of Big G's heralds. And yeah, the story is pretty groovy, and it could be going places, so I'll be looking forward to the second issue.

Kano should probably be a star by now, but it seems he keeps getting overlooked for the big assignments, and that's a shame, as he really bridges the gap between a looser, cartoonier line, and more of what's the Marvel house style, but it gives the art a real verve.

This puppy's a whole lotta pages for four bucks and has no ads! What it does have, though, is a reprint of Thor #337, the first appearance of Beta Ray Bill, written and drawn by Walt Simonson. I've got this issue in my collection already, but what really struck me in perusing the reprint were the colors, especially when compared to the new story. George Roussos provided the original coloring to this old story; on newsprint, it looked cool, rife with Benday dots, but on these slick magazine pages, the bold flat colors throttle one's retinas-- in a good way, of course.

Take a look at the two panels above. Which ones excites you more? Yes, coloring is far more of an art in comics these days, and I do enjoy the various digital brush strokes you can see in Thor's face on the opening pages, but these bombastic colors in the back half of the mag really command my attention. A lot of coloring these days feels really over-rendered, which gives the pages a muddled feel, and certain contributes to the "sameyness" of Marvel art. Loads of careful attention is paid to the comics page these days, but I can't help be more enchanted by the almost violent, done-by-hand work of Simonson, Workman, and Roussos in some old issue of Thor.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Tales of the Vampires by Becky Cloonan, Vasilis Lolos, Dave Stewart, and Comicraft's Jimmy (Dark Horse)

I made sure to buy the one that had the Moon-n-Ba cover, because those two gents are awesome.

What Cloonan and Lolos give us here is something only tangentially related to the Buffyverse, but I'm glad that Buffy logo is on there, because that means a lot more people are gonna buy this comic, which is superbly crafted. Cloonan works away at the periphery of the Buffy mythos-- folks know vampires exist now, sure, and slayers are out there, but Nashua, New Hampshire is far from the Hellmouth (well, closer to the one in Cleveland), and dull teenage life is still dull teenage life. Jacob yearns for more, and he gets it-- at a price, of course. It's about choices, and bad ones, specifically.

Cloonan's known for her art, but she really sells the script here, especially with the mother character. Lolos' art is excellent as always, deftly cartooned, letting the primary characters be almost swallowed by the empty backgrounds, until the vampires bring everything into close-up.

Dave Stewart's colors are magnificent. There's a reason he's the best in the biz, and it helps that he falls more in line with what I talked about above. Many of the colors here are subdued-- lots of mauve, surprisingly-- but that works to the art's advantage. I dig Stewart's play with light, whether in the panel above with the parking lot lamps, or with the shadow that so often appears on the protagonist's face for the first half of the book.

So yeah, it's a good book, probably more akin to Demo than any issue of Buffy, and I hope the usual Buffy audience picks it up and responds well to it.

Lightning Round!

Astonishing X-Men #30 by Warren Ellis, Simone Bianchi, Andrea Silvestri, Simone Peruzzi, Morry Hollowell, and Chris Eliopoulos (Marvel)

A lot of folks rag on Simone Bianchi's art, and I'll say this: I really dig it. It's not the most dynamic, and the storytelling isn't necessarily brilliant, but my word, look at those ink washes! Every page of this looks like it wasn't sullied by mere human birth but instead brought down from Olympus by the god of storks himself and raised on pure, massaged Kobe beef. Other than that, the story finally decides to go places in its last chapter and the X-Men become dark, mean, genocidal maniacs. Maybe this is the beginnings of a dark, longform plot from Mr. Ellis, but it takes a lot to make me enjoy an X-Men comic, and I don't feel I'll be back for the next arc. Sorry, chaps.

Captain Britain & MI13 Annual #1/#14 by Paul Cornell, Mike Collins, Adrian Alphona, Leonard Kirk, Ardian Syaf, Livesay, Jay Leisten, Craig Yeun, Jay David Ramos, Christina Strain, Brian Reber, and Joe Caramanga (Marvel)

You know, I read the Annual, and still I feel that I don't know anything about Meggan or the game of cricket. There's not much in here to excite me or make me really care about the characters. Sorry, Paul! But I did very much enjoy #14. Yes, the opening negates the previous issue's balls-to-the-wall cliffhanger, but it does so using pieces earned from previous stories. Things are heating up for the big finale, and I'm looking forward to it, though I'm saddened that the end is near.

Seaguy: Slaves of Mickey Eye #3 by Grant Morrison, Cameron Stewart, Dave Stewart (no relation), and Todd Klein (DC/Vertigo)

I was going to write about this here, but I'm now considering saving my thoughts for a larger standalone post. But it may just have redeemed this mini-series for me; I'll have to reread the series and get back to you later. Promise!

Two-in-One Review!

Doctor Who: Autopia by John Ostrander, Kelly Yates, Kris Carter, and Kubikiri (IDW)

Thor: The Trial of Thor by Peter Milligan, Cary Nord, Christina Strain, and Joe Caramanga (Marvel)

I try not to buy comics whose titles don't start with A, B, or C, but sometimes I make exceptions.

I've lumped these two comics together because they both provoke the same feeling in me, which is that they feel like comics you'd find in a three-for-a-dollar bin in the back of a comic shop, wedged between unloved issues of Dan Jurgens' Justice League run. By which I mean they both exude the less-than-sexy aroma of the dreaded "filler." This Thor book is not unlike a random Thor annual you'd find in the early 80s, only with better coloring, and the Doctor Who comic lacks any of the more interesting or exciting ideas and developments you'd find in the show; it's just what one fears when they open a licensed comic.

I know Ostrander and Milligan are good writers-- I've read their good writing! I feel they're more capable than this. Both comics just kinda go through the motions, shuffling towards the inevitable when they happen to run out of pages and the plot decides to stop. The artists do their best with the material-- Kelly Yates' cartooning is quite polished, and he storytells the hell out of a plot that mostly consists of guys and robots standing around; Cary Nord draws a mean fantasy barbarian comic, and this issue is no exception.

Neither book, however, thrilled, intrigued, or otherwise truly entertained me. There's nothing inherently wrong with these comics-- everybody does a professional job, nothing stands out as an eyesore-- but they're just kinda there. A mediocre comic from good creators is the most depressing comic of them all.

5 Comments

• At July 2, 2009, Chad Nevett wrote:

  Trial of Thor is almost worth it just for the whole CSI: Asgard element. I would totally buy a comic ...

• At July 2, 2009, Ian A. wrote:

  Wegener’s artwork is crispier than fried chicken

  If Red 5 doesn't use that as a pull-quote and slap it on the ...

• At July 3, 2009, Cass wrote:

  SPOILERS: I hated that it was the dwarves at the end of Milligan's Thor. I'd read Ages of Thunder and ...

• At July 3, 2009, Scott! wrote:

  I agree with Ian =D

  Gonna email this one to the bosses right now.

• At July 3, 2009, Philip Ayres wrote:

  > You know, I read the Annual, and still I feel that I don’t know anything about Meggan or the ...